Sunday, December 30, 2012

A Movie! A Movie!

Alert the media!  We have seen a movie!  Our first in 2012 (and I daresay probably our last for this year!)

Walt asked if I was interested in seeing Lincoln this afternoon and I literally jumped at the chance.  I've wanted to see the movie ever since it came out.

We went at 3 p.m. and fortunately got there early enough to get my favorite seats, because within 10 minutes the theater, even this long after the movie's opening, was just about full.

I. loved. it.  As many have said, even though you know how things are all going to play out, Spielberg does such a masterful job that he creates great tension as everyone in the House chamber waits anxiously for the outcome on the vote on the 13th ammendment to the Constitution.  In listening to the arguments for and against, it made me think that this is probably similar to debates going on on many gay rights issues that have been debated in the House lately.

If Daniel Day-Lewis doesn't get an Oscar, he was robbed.  Sally Field may be up against some fierce competition, but she, too, gave a masterful performance in a role that, according to her, she had to really fight to get.  But having seen her performance, it's hard to imagine anyone else playing Mary Todd Lincoln.   As for James Spader as the scoundrel W.N. Bilbo, I didn't recognize him, but Walt did and said that with that cigar he frequently smoked, he needed William Shatner to be with him.

As always, we stayed through the credits.  If not, we never would have known that Ambassador Jean Kennedy Smith had a bit part as one of the "shouting women" in a scene.  Or that Kevin Kline--yes "the" Kevin Kline--was a "wounded soldier."  Now I want to see the movie again to see if I can spot those two!

It was a nice way to escape from all that's going on around here right now, if only for a few hours.

BobSophiesm.jpg (143347 bytes) 
This morning I received a note from my cousin Donna, asking me to post the following information on the Caring Bridge site I set up to keep people informed about Bob's condition:

Dearest Family,
Our dear Bob is not doing as well as hoped. Peach has asked me to share this picture from Christmas of Bob and his beloved Sophie and to let you all know he does not have a lot of time left here with us, though it could be up to 6 months. Hes not really responsive and we need to send him our love and light and prayers and hope that the time he is here will be as gentle and easy and loving as he is and always has been. Please, if you want to contact Peach, do so through facebook or the Caring Bridge Page that Bev created. These are difficult times for the family and we all need to give as much support as possible in our own ways. We will keep you updated on what is going on, but for now please hold our family close in your hearts with love, especially our Peach and Bob.
Much love to all, and have a wonderful New Years
~ Donna

As soon as I had posted Donna's update to Caring Bridge I called Peach and we had a good conversation and cried together.  They are meeting to decide the way to go with him, whether hospice care or long-term care.  Hospice care seems out of the question since it would involve moving him home and Peach is just not physically able to care for him 24/7.
It's at times like this when I am angry with how our system works.  If this were Sophie, the dog, who were in this condition, Peach would hold her in her arms as a veterinarian gave her a shot which would let her peacefully leave this life.   But because Bob is a human being, there have to be decisions made about how to keep him as pain-free and comfortable as can be, while the family sits around watching him die.   Somehow it just doesn't seem fair...or humane.

I picked up e-mail after Peach and I finished our conversation and there was a note from one of the Lamplighters letting us know that someone we have known since the 1960s has been diagnosed with Stage 4, inoperable pancreatic cancer and is now on Hospice care.  She's a wonderful person, a wonderful actress and director and this will be a great loss to those who have been closer to her in the past couple of decades.

I also called my mother to give her the update on Bob.  I've talked with her three times since we got home from Santa Barbara on Wednesday and each time she asks me if we are home yet, when we got home, and if we had a good Christmas.  This has been another proof of the theory someone expressed to me that when someone with memory problems has another physical problem (she's had mild flu symptoms this week and just wasn't feeling well over Christmas), it affects the memory.  I am hoping that now that she is starting to feel better, her memory will improve a bit too, as it has in the past.

As soon as Peach feels she can take a day off, we are going to my mother's for another overnight.  Won't call it "cousins day," but I think she desperately needs both a day away, and a day with my mother, who has been her surrogate mother since her own mother died many years ago. She agrees.  But first all the paperwork needs to get done and Bob's situation needs to be settled.


Mary Z said...

I'm so glad you got a brief respite from worrying about your loved ones. It's so tough!

We really want to see Lincoln, too. John doesn't think a movie should ever last over 90 minutes (I don't know where he got this), but he will tolerate up to 2 hours. I think he'll do this one, though.

I'm waiting for you to see and comment on Les Mis. John won't go see that one (although he loved the stage production), and that's fine with me. I want to go by myself, sit in my favorite seat (middle of the back row) and love the music.

phonelady said...

So glad you liked the Lincoln movie I wanted to see it too but just really cant spare the dimes right now . we are moving south so the dimes are really being squeezed right now and we need to keep our eyes on the prize so to speak and I hope Lewis does get an oscar and I have heard alot of ppl say that he deserves one too . Oh well good to see 2013 has you coming back and forth like the rest of us . well take care .