Day of Rest

Yesterday was the day of rest and I took its meaning literally.  I mostly "rested."  I cranked out some Compassion letters and wrote letters to both Brianna and Lacie.  I had not written to them since they went to New York, so I could talk about their trip in my letter(s).  I also found a site where you can make one of those find-a-word puzzles and I made 2 for the girls, each with the same Harry Potter words:

DEMENTOR	DUMBLEDORE	HAGRID
HERMIONE	HUFFLEPUFF	MALFOY
QUIDDITCH	RAVENCLAW	VOLDEMORT
WEASLEY

But Lacie's is easier because the words just go forwards and backwards, where Bri's also uses diagonal words.

That took quite a bit of time (and took even more time to reproduce here!).

In the evening I watched the amazing World of Dance competition...I swear none of those people has any bones at all! ... and then the first two episodes of Outlander, season 2, after which I was able to fall asleep and pretty much slept through the night.

This morning Ned topped by on his way to Atria to box up my mother's stuff.  We talked about the disposition of her things and they will probably all end up out in the dump.  We could donate the furniture, but I suspect it has all been peed upon or bled into at one time or another and who would want it?  The dresser would be in good condition if one piece hadn't broken off and is missing.  

 

Before Ned went to Atria, he took Walt to Kaiser to return the loaner C-PAP machine.  The 2 week test he took to see if it's working for him was very good and he is apparently getting better sleep, so we are getting one of our own.

I was almost out the door on my way to meet my friend Kathy for lunch when a text message came from Sandy, saying my mother needs extra meds to calm her confusion and aggressiveness.  So I guess that moving to house wasn't the answer, but he seems to know how to work with her so I sent off a request to her doctor.

I know some people are upset when they go into care homes and see people who look all drugged up and maybe that will be my mother, but if a drugged state can give her a better quality of life, why worry about it? She's certainly not happy now so maybe we can improve that medicinally.

Lunch was nice.  We are both in better places than we were a month ago and that is a good thing. 

I ordered a small pizza for lunch and it was the size of the pizza  i would buy or make for Walt and me, so I brought home half and that will be his dinner tonight, along with the leftovers from last night's dinner.

He is having his first appointment with Cindy as I write this.  He had to leave his dentist of about 50 years in Berkeley because he doesn't feel he's up to the drive he needs to do to get there any more.  He even got a nice farewell letter from his old dentist.  I hope he likes Cindy's office as much as I do.

Girl Talk

I had lunch at Tres Hermanas Mexican restaurant with my friend Kathleen yesterday.

I love the restaurant not only for the good food, but for the unique decor.

Kathy and I used to have lunch every month, but it's been a rough year for the both of us and while she tells me it's not quite a year since our last lunch, it's pretty darn close.  She was supposed to bring me Girl Scout cookies, if that's any indication of how long it's been....this would have been 2018 cookies.

We lingered over lunch for two hours, getting caught up on our lives, and raking the current administration over the coals.  Kind of what we always do, but in more detail since there were more months to cover.  It was better than a therapist appointment.  I sorely miss one on one girl chats and I left lunch today on a real high.  We have already set a date for our March lunch, so I guess we are back on rack again.

And the food was delicious.  I had checked the menu on line before we met and discovered they were offering a crab enchilada which of course I had to try.  It was fabulous, with real chunks of crab in it.  Of course it came with rice and refried beans and Kathy had ordered guacamole for us, since she was treating me to a birthday lunch a few days early.  I normally never finish a big lunch, but this was too good and I ate it all.  I was so stuffed when I got home, I had to take a siesta and then when I cooked dinner, I realized that there was no way I was going to eat anything, so I just served dinner to Walt.

On the drive home, I was listening to BBC news reporting on the situation in Hungary at the moment.  The latest headlines tell of the government control over news reporting institutions, most of which are "fake news," prime minister Orban says.  This move will only allow government-friendly organizations internet access.  More than 400 web sites, newspapers, tv channels and radio stations are rushing to transfer to Central European press, though if any are caught printing anti-Orban news, they can have negative government feedback.

Since taking power in 2010, Orban has steadily chipped away at Hungary’s checks and balances, stacking the Constitutional Court with loyalists, reshaping the electoral system to favor his party and placing dozens of watchdog institutions — including the judiciary and prosecution service — under the leadership of his allies.

The reporter said this is the new wave in many countries--where a would-be autocrat, skilled at media, uses his expertise to get elected and then starts reshaping the country. getting rid of the rules and regulations they deem distasteful.

Sound familiar?

Kathy and I bemoaned the fact that the work of the LGBT community to achieve rights in housing, employment and other things (could marriage be next?) has been eroded.  I'm wondering how the current administration is going to find a way to nullify the thousands of marriages that have taken place since marriage equality was won.  I'm sure that is on the agenda if they can figure out how to do it.

Calendars

Happy Friday the 13th, all.  I wouldn't even have thought of it if someone hadn't mentioned it on TV.

Yesterday was not an unlucky day; it was definitely a lucky day.

I was very lucky that Walt came in at about 11:15 and asked me what shows we are seeing this weekend.  I looked at the calendar and read the name of the three shows we were seeing and then realized I was looking at the shows for next week.

So I turned the calendar back to this week -- it was now 11:22 -- and saw that I had a lunch date with my friend Kathy (whom I meet at 11:30).  We have been doing these monthly lunches for about 20 years now and this may be the VERY FIRST TIME that neither of us emailed the other to verify that we were actually getting together.

I quickly called her and she said she was just getting off the freeway in Davis, so I rushed to the restaurant and got there not really very long after 11:30 (fortunately this is a small town).  It was a nice lunch without a lot of angst or trauma this time.  Oh there was angst and there was trauma and there is always the president, but overall it was a fairly unemotional lunch.

I had been snacking before I left home, so I really wasn't very hungry so instead of ordering a "meal" I ordered a Cajun shrimp appetizer, which was delicious and just the right size.  I was actually able to finish the whole thing.

Of course when I got home Walt was disappointed because I usually have so much food left over I bring it home to him for lunch, and he had postponed having lunch because he was waiting for my leftovers.  Sorry.  I ate every single bite.

I was watching Polly last night as she chewed on a lamb bone Walt had given her and realized that, with Lizzie gone, she has created an "apartment" for herself.  The bed on the left has become her sleeping place, with a blanket she brought into it.  The one on the right is her "dining room," where she brings food to either eat or "bury" in the seam of the outside lip of the bed.  

Watching her trying to dig out a rawhide treat is so funny--she gets hysterical if she can't get it out and Walt had to help her.  Not sure why she brought the dishtowel into her dining room...maybe a table cloth?

---

I was saddened today to read of the death of Dr. Dame Daphne Sheldrick, from breast cancer, at age 84.  Whenever I have a Sunday Stealing or other question about personal heroes, she is often on my list.  She is that marvelous woman in Kenya who established the David Sheldrick Charitable Trust (to honor her late husband) which rescues orphan elephants and raises them to be able to return them to the wild when they are old enough.  I can't begin to think of the number of babies she has saved.  What a wonderful legacy.  Fortunately, her daughter will continue her work

The State of My Union

No, I will not watch the State of the Union tonight.  The last thing I need is to spend an hour watching #45 tell us how wonderful he is.  I figure if anything memorable or historic happens, it will be dissected over and over and over again by the talking heads.

Instead, I think I'll watch this....

...and remember when we could be proud of our country.  It's from Letterman's new show on Netflix.  I watched part of it last night and it was so nice to see Obama again, and in such a relaxed form.  And how nice to see a president talk with such love and affection -- and pride -- about his wife.

---

 

We may have finally found our restaurant.  Ever since Cafe Italia, where my friend Kathy and I have been eating lunch every month for the past ~2 years was forced to shut down, we have been searching for a new restaurant in Davis.  We both admitted that though we have been eating in Italian restaurants (the Olive Garden in Sacramento for about 10 or more years, and then Cafe Italia) neither of us were wedded to Italian, so we have tried Mexican, Chinese, burgers, and barbeque, but nothing hit us as the perfect place.  (Davis is replete with Thai and Japanese restaurants, but Kathy doesn't like spicy food and isn't into sushi.) Yesterday we went to Paesano's, which happens to be Italian again, but it seemed to be the right fit.  I had the most wonderful pesto tortellini.

 

Kathy, who normally orders spaghetti "light on the sauce" got exactly that, which she didn't always at Cafe Italia.  She seems to have enjoyed it and agreed to go back again next month.  I'm glad because I saw several other things on the menu I want to try.  I guess no matter what we do, we are destined to eat Italian!

---

 

After lunch, I drove to the post office to mail a few letters and then through the cemetery to check on the flowers we left last night.  I encountered a flock of turkeys and stopped to watch them.  Two of them were either fighting or playing.  They chased each other around and around a tree, first in one direction and then in the other.  Then they'd fly up at each other and back to the ground to chase each other again.

 

I know the turkeys are a big pain in the patootie around town, but I do admit enjoying it when I stumble on them and get to watch them in action (especially from the safety of the car).

If It's Tuesday

If it's the third week of the month, it must be time for lunch with my friend Kathy again.

We're kind of homeless and wandering at the moment.  For the first 12 or so years that we met monthly for lunch, we ate at the Olive Garden in Sacramento, which was near where she worked.  I didn't work and I enjoyed the drive to Sacramento (got to listen to my audio book), so I didn't mind the 30 minute drive to meet her.

When she retired, she decided it was her turn to do the driving and, despite my protests that I really enjoyed the drive, she started coming to Davis.  For a couple of years, we ate monthly at Cafe Italia.

We at in one of these uncomfortable booths and had our "regular," usually a roast beef sandwich for me and spaghetti for Kathy (usually with the sauce on the side).  It was a nice tradition.

But Cafe Italia has had to close its doors due to expansion of the motel which owns it, and while we cringed each month wondering if "this" would be our last lunch, it lasted longer than we expected, but that day did finally come and so we had to find a new place.

We both like Mexican food, so we tried Tres Hermanas last month.  I had only eaten there twice before, and what I like most about it is the decor.

It wasn't as good as I thought it would be.  i wasn't feeling all that well, so just had a plain tamale.  Kathy didn't like the menu, so just had rice and beans.

When we were choosing where to eat this month, I suggested Ding How, the Chinese restaurant where we ate with (the other) Jeri and Phil last month.

We both had a lemon chicken lunch and it was delicious, but waaay too much.  I intended to finish mine for dinner, as did Kathy.

I've mentioned before that we usually talk politics.  For years it was moaning about G.W. Bush, then we had 7 happy years until Trump started looking like a viable candidate and our lunches were rife with "how can we stop this man?" and comparing what horrible things he had done/said now.

But now it's over and what do we talk about?  It's a done deal, he is more horrible each day (telling a pregnant widow "he knew what he was signing up for, but I guess it still hurts" ???) and there is no point in wallowing in the depression that will be with us until the next campaign.

So we talked about our kids, books, TV shows and, you know, regular stuff.  It was nice!

Have we found another "regular" restaurant?  Well...no.  But there is a Dickey's BBQ nearby, which I have never been to and Kathy likes, so that is our spot for next month.

Giving Tuesday

We've had Black Friday (which now appears to last all week), and Cyber Monday and today is Giving Tuesday.  I was overwhelmed when I opened my e-mail this morning.  There were thirty-nine organizations asking for donations.  And this is just the FIRST e-mail of the morning.  I decided to list them here.  Some of them I've never heard of before:

Alzheimer's Assn
The Animal Rescue Site
Save the Children
Juvenile Diabetes Assn
Samaritan's purse
World Wildlife Fund
National Catholic Reporter
Capital Stage
Acme Theater Company
Kids Apraxia
IPFF/WHR -- I had to look this up -- it's Planned Parenthood
David Sheldrick Foundation (saving orphaned elephants)
Wildlife Conservation Society
Michael J. Fox Foundation
Human Rights Campaign
Novica
Greater Tod Network (this may be a typo on my part)
Nat'l Assn of Free & Charitable Clinics
American Diabetes Assn.
Wilderness Society
Int'l Fund for Animal Welfare
Earth Justice
NARAL (Pro Choice)
African Wildlife Fund
GLAAD
Canadian Breast Cancer Fdn
Global Giving
Center for Biological Diversity
The Million Nets Fund
Fistula Foundation
WISER Int'l  (World Insitute for Strategic Economic Research)
Int'l Rescue Committee
ALS Assn
UNICEF
Charity Navigator
People for the American Way
United Farm Workers
World Concern
Animal Place
Yolo County SPCA
Movemember Fdn
ACLU
Sacred Heart Cathedral Prep (my old high school)
Save the Arctic Caribou
In Defense of Animals
Doctors without Borders
Every Town for Gun Safety
Humane Society
American Wild Horse Preservation

Oddly, there is no request for additional giving from Compassion.  Yet.  The day is still young.  I can't remember how many of these organizations I have ever, in my life, given a donation to, but not all that many.  I am more likely to send a donation to an animal group like the Sheldrick Foundation, groups that help kids, or groups like Planned Parenthood.  I sponsored a woman through the Fistula Foundation for a year and they still love me and thank me every year for my support, though I have not sent them money in a long time.  Hope springs eternal.

The problem is that all of these groups do good work and help lots of people and animals and at times like this I am sad that my discretionary income is so limited and I can only do just so much.  A list like this does, however, keep me from spending a lot of money on silly unnecessary stuff for myself.

$  $  $  $

I went out to my monthly lunch with my friend Kathy and when I returned decided to see what requests I had received in the few hours since I started this entry.  I spoke too soon about Compassion.  They were the top of the list for the Giving Tuesday afternoon.  At 2 p.m., I had received requests from 11 more charities and repeat requests from several organizations that are already on the list.

Compassion International (offering "free shipping on goats")
Cap City AIDS Fund
All Out -- Russia
The Lamplighters
World Vision
Immigrant Youth Coalition
B Street Theater
San Francisco Chronicle Season of Giving Fund
Oceanic Preservation Society
The Future of America Society
National Day Laborer Organizing Committee
Sacramento LGBT Community Center

Bringing the total number of charities who want my money to more than 50.  In one day.  I've given up counting.  It's too overwhelming.  I'm not giving anything to anybody on "Giving Tuesday."

---

I always look forward to my lunches with Kathy.  It always rejuvenates me and I go home on a high.

Today was different.

Today's lunch was .... morose, for want of a better term.

We had planned a gala celebration, happily drinking a toast to Hillary's election.  Instead there was nothing happy about today, and no celebration.  We shared disappointment, anger, fear about the names that seem to be added to Trump's cabinet, his seeming lack of interest in learning anything about the protocols of the office he is about to assume, our shock (or maybe not) at watching him slowly back up on almost every promise he made when campaigning, shock at his tweets which still sound like a schoolyard bully ("If Crooked Hillary insists on a recount, I will change my mind about not prosecuting her.")  Anger that he now decides he can run his business and the government both out of the oval office.

We ended lunch with nothing to say and both kind of slumped out to our cars.  I decided that the combination of post-Trump election malaise and Mom frustration is turning me somewhat catatonic.

I strongly urge people to check out this video by Keith Olberman for wondering whether the election that Trump himself himself won was rigged and into the mainstream media for giving Donald Trump’s absurd conspiracy theories the same coverage they would receive if they were serious concerns. Olberman pulls no punches and addresses most of the fears many of us have.