Sunday
was a bittersweet day from start to finish. We started at Atria,
meeting Ned and Marta for brunch, to celebrate my mother's birthday, which
is tomorrow.
We've been over this for a week or more, but she didn't
remember, of course. After her surprise that I was there, she was
surprised again when Ned and Marta showed up, and especially when they
wished her a happy birthday because she never realized it was her birthday.
When we all went to lunch, she asked why and then was
surprised to find out it was her birthday and then as we sat down, she was
astonished to learn it was her birthday. One thing about dementia--you
get a lot of nice surprises!
For
lunch we asked for two servings of brownie with ice cream. Walt wanted
one of his own and Ned, Marta, my mother and I shared the other, which Ned
cut into 4 equal pieces. She laughed when served, then looked away and
when she looked back, she asked where that had come from and why were we
having dessert and then was surprised to find out it was her birthday.
To my surprise, when we returned to the apartment, a woman,
pushing a woman I had never seen before, knocked on the door. The
woman who knocked obviously knew my mother and it was someone I had never
seen before, which pleased me because my mother kinda sorta recognized her,
which means she has made friends with someone on the staff. Anyway,
the woman was bringing her a card and a piece of cake (which will sit in the
fridge until I finally throw it away next month)
All things considered, except for the dementia part, it was
a good day, she was in good spirits, we laughed a lot and then Walt and I
went home, while Ned and Marta spent another 3 hours or so there until time
to go to our second event of the day.
The second event was the memorial service for our friend
Dave Fisk. One of the things they included was a video that had been
made by an organization he was part of, which is only 6 minutes long and was
so perfect to show Dave, his history, and his family. If you'd like to
see it, you can find it
here.
It was a beautiful memorial and the Art Center, where it was
held, was packed. By serendipitous chance, the gallery where they hold
periodic exhibitions had no shows up at the moment, so they used the gallery
to showcase Dave's watercolors and mementos of his life. Really a
lovely way to see the whole of Dave's life.
There was a beautiful memorial service, with memories by
almost everyone in the large Fisk-Bonneau family. This is their
second offspring funeral (oldest son Greg died of cancer many years ago),
and they are also a performing family, so, like us, they know how to do a
good memorial.
Dave had been the announcer for Davis Little League games,
so after the memorial, we all walked across the street to the Little League
field, where we all stood around and sang "Take me out to the Ball Game,"
rooting, rooting, rooting for the Red Sox, Dave's favorite team.
Afterwards, several people, big and little kids, ran the
bases of the field. This is a picture of Dave's brother Chad coming
into home plate (I was sorry he didn't slide!)
It was a loving day and we saw lots of people we had not
seen in years. I also hugged Dave's brother Jason, retired now, but
formerly defensive tackle for the Vikings, with whom he played Super Bowl
XXXIV, and other teams. I had not realized a person could be so tall
or so muscular! The man's a rock and, like everyone else in his
family, one of the sweetest people you'd ever meet.
So it was with mixed emotions that we left the memorial.
Both events had been full of love, but also touched with sadness.
Dave
and his family have been our friends since all the kids were in school
together. There are a lot of Fisks, and a lot of Sykeses and they did
a lot together. Brother Chad was in theatrical productions with our
kids. Dave was always included in everything that the other kids did.