Toothless Joe

I said I would talk about Ned's birthday present to Brianna after she received it.  Here it is:

 

This is a 10 page comic book which tells about Toothless Joe, who gets zapped by some ball of light and develops super powers, and all the good and bad things that result from that (best is turning rocks into salt water taffy).  It ends on a cliffhanger, with promises that the questions raised will be answered next year.

It's just wonderful, so brightly colored and on heavy stock paper.  And it cost a small fortune to get it to her on her birthday (UPS wanted $250 to get it to Santa Barbara overnight.  He did NOT pay that!), but she got it in time and I'm sure sure loves it.

 I'll tell ya, these girls are never going to feel unloved.  Ned did all this work for weeks on this book, Jeri sent a video of her entire class singing happy birthday to Brianna, we sent her a gift from Amazon and then did a Facetime chat with her.  Her birthday celebration has gone on for about four days now.  She's a lucky girl!
 

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Today I played Holly Homemaker.  I've had a bone from a leg of lamb in the freezer, taking up entirely too much space, so I decided to make one of my favorite soups, Lamb Soup of the Middle East, and do it in the Instant Pot.  The ultimate recipe ended up part Instant Pot cookbook, part soup cookbook (from the days before Instantpots), and part me, compensating for things I didn't have and had to substitute.

But the end result was delicious.

Having done home made soup, it was time to use that dough hook I recently ordered from Amazon and try the Bobby Flay Parker House rolls I've been wanting to make for a long time.  You can tell I got up to my elbows in floury bread dough. But they were delicious...and I have lots in the freezer for later.

Homemade Soup and Homemade rolls.  I felt positively like Holly Homemaker.

In the meantime, the TV has remained off and I have been engrossed in a book.  Ned has set up all the books from upstairs and told us move the ones we want to keep to a table and the rest he will donate somewhere.  I haven't done a lot of sorting, but I came across the book "Forever Restless," that I haven't read.

It was written by our family friend Father Joe O'Looney and my mother typed the original.  He has no publication information on the book, so I can't remember when it was published, but I would guess sometime before 1996.  Interestingly there is nothing when you do a search on Amazon, but when you do a google search, it brings up the book on Amazon.

Fr. Joe and I had a rocky relationship, but for many years at the end of his life he was my mother's best friend.  I never wanted to read the book, so have a copy, but had not read it.  However, I grudgingly admit that it's really a good book.  Perhaps somewhat because I know his family well, I know the places he discusses in San Francisco, and as a product of the Catholic school system, I can relate to his experiences there too.  He was in our lives from about 1950 to his death, at age 88 so I remember (sometimes only vaguely) a lot of what he is writing about -- and my mother is even mentioned in the book.  I am only about halfway through but I am finding it riveting.  Fortunately, he's dead and my mother doesn't remember who he is, so I don't have to admit that to anyone!

Now Yer Cooking

I put our membership in Home Chef on hold when this "whatever it is" started making dinners frustrating.  Mis en place exhausted me.  Tom says he loves it, getting all the ingredients chopped, measured and in their own bowls ready to put together with the final product. Ned also likes the precision of getting his ingredients in order before he starts to cook. Thank goodness I didn't work in a professional kitchen.

By the time I had completed the few admittedly simple steps of our Blue Apron or Home Chef meal, I was dripping with sweat and near tears.  Not a good way to sit down at dinner each night.

Surprisingly, I also missed planning meals, the thing that I hated so much that it drove me to trying Blue Apron and Home Chef in the first place.  So I'm back to preparing my specialty, "something with chicken in it" alternating with "Joe Special," "something Mexican," and the occasional pork chop.

I like being in control again, though I am hampered by not going to the store myself.  I suppose I could probably go, but my legs feel so weak when I walk any distance that I'm not sure I could easily make it through the entire store, so I send Walt with a list, which eliminates those impulse buys I used to make based on what looks good and sparks my brain to think of something new to prepare.

But the problem I'm having in my dotage is that I can't make anything any more without screwing it up.  It was always the case with the Blue Apron and Home Chef meals.  I'd get everything on the plate and then realize that I'd left out a key ingredient, or we'd finish dinner and I'd discover the package of whatever was supposed to be sprinkled over the top to enhance the flavor.

The other night I decided to try InstantPot lasagna (I won't do that again).  It had the advantage of Walt being at his friend Malcolm's house, so I had 2 hours to prepare it and could definitely do it at my leisure.  Only the pot malfunctioned somehow.  It would not build up pressure and ultimately it cooked the lasagna, but left a black mess on the bottom of the pot, where the water had all burned away.  And, truth  to tell, I wasn't all that enamored with the result.  I thought it would be good to have a smaller lasagna rather  than a huge one that would take 3 meals to finish but, really, how difficult is it to prepare lasagna anyway? And it has the advantage of not having to cook for the next two nights.

Last night I made a quiche.  I haven't made quiche in forever.  I baked the bacon in the morning (I've decided baked bacon is the way to go!) and had it all cut up by the time I was ready to assemble the pie.  I made the crust during Rachel Maddow, so it had time to chill before I rolled it out.

Pie crust is one of my favoritest things in the world.   The very best pie crust I ever had was when Walt and I were engaged and had dinner at the home of a friend of his mother's.  The crust was so flaky and tender I had to ask her how she made it.  I don't think I ever duplicated it, but throughout my cooking life I have made lots and lots of pies and then a few years back all of a sudden I could not roll pie dough to save my soul.  Absolutely NOTHING had changed in how I made it, but the dough just would not roll out wide enough and I ended up having to patch it together.  I tried all sorts of things including the most successful, rolling it in a special bag (thanks, Mary Williams).  But it still wasn't perfect.

My recipe came from Julia Child, so it was impeccable.  In fact, Jeri asked for it and makes it all the time, but it just never works for me any more.

But last night for some reason it all went perfectly.  I did minimum handling of the dough, I chilled it for 30 minutes, and even without the pie bag, it rolled well....not as well as I would have liked but it came close to what I used to make.

I filled the crust with my pre-baked bacon and all the cheese, eggs, and 1/2 & 1/2 and stuck it in the oven.  When I took it out, it looked perfect.  I was BACK, baby!

I eagerly broke off a piece of the crust to taste and it had the consistency of a cracker.  Hard and crunchy without a flake to be had.  I went over and over in my head how I had made it and what could I possibly have done wrong and then, when going to sleep, still stewing over why my crust had not turned out the way it should have, I realized that the recipe calls for adding 3 Tbsp of oil...and I had forgotten that.  Sigh.  I mean it was an OK quiche, but just not what I was hoping for and once again I had made a simple recipe and screwed it up.  

I've been a good cook all my life, but my talents are definitely fading.  Is this why old people go into facilities like Atria so they don't have to cook any more?

Never Too Old to Learn

I watch a lot of the Food Network lately.  Heck, even Walt can recognize several of the chefs now.  I am particularly impressed, and somewhat intimidated by, the contestants in the children's competitions.  Those kids know more at age 10 or 11 than I know at age 73.  The little kids are teaching me terminology and techniques that I should have known for years.

The Food Network, combined with our Blue Apron subscription, which I am liking more and more, are both teaching me cooking skills I should have had years ago.  Who knew that a simple thing like waiting for oil to be HOT before adding meat, fish or chicken would significantly improve the final product?

Blue Apron is also getting me into the habit of creating a mis en place, getting all ingredients chopped, measured, and in individual bowls before starting to cook.  I was always the one unwrapping the meat while the chopped onions were turning too brown in the pan, or frantically searching for a measuring cup or spoon while the food in the pan overcooks.  Now I use lots of little bowls for the pre-chopped ingredients and the cooking goes more smoothly.

After all these years, I finally know how best to cook a slab of beef or piece of chicken and have it turn out the way I want...and not stick to the pan when I try to turn it.'

Thanks to Blue Apron, I have eaten more kale, chard and collard greens than ever in my life.  I'm still not going to make a kale salad or replace lettuce in a sandwich with kale, but when mixed in with other ingredients and cooked, I hardly even know it's there.  Last night's kale with purple potatoes, onion and apple was delicious.  (I will admit to still pushing aside beets though; I do have some standards to maintain.  That's OK.  Walt tolerates the onions I put in the recipes and patiently removes them all before eating)

Prior to Blue Apron, I never cooked fish and only occasionally splurged and bought a crab.  It's not that I don't like fish, but the prices just put me off.  I would buy cheap hamburger instead.  Now we are eating fish once a week, in all sorts of ways (this week it will be cod tacos -- for Cinco de Mayo, I guess)

We’re wrapping corn tortillas around pan-fried cod, alongside creamy avocado, crisp radish and a delicious element that fish tacos picked up along the California coast: crunchy cabbage slaw. Our gorgeous slaw is infused with the smoky, robust heat of a chipotle pepper in adobo sauce (or a dried jalapeño marinated in a sauce typically made with tomatoes, herbs, spices and vinegar).

Blue Apron has introduced us to dozens of new recipes like Yuzu-Shoyu Soba with cabbage and Togarashi (a Japanese dish with soba noodles) or Za'atar Chicken and Pearl Couscous (an Israeli pasta dish).  I've learned that when they include a special spice packet and it warns "use as much of the spice blend as you'd like, depending on how spicy you'd like the dish to be," I should only use half the package, because the full package is MUCH more spicy than I would like to eat.

In the past, the starch on my plate has been rice, potatoes, or pasta.  Now I've added things like sweet potato, cracked freekeh ("an ancient grain with a deliciously nutty taste"), couscous (not the instant kind I buy at the supermarket) and faro (a mixture of grains of certain wheat species).

And plantains!  My goodness....plantains!  Where have they been all my life?  Oh, I knew them, of course.  Even ate them a few times when visiting my friend Melody, whose significant other was from Nigeria.  But now I've had them fried and discovered that mashed they are a great potato substitute.  In fact, thanks to The Food Network, I'm making something called an "enchilasagna" for Cinco de Mayo tomorrow.  It is a quasi lasagna made with layers of corn tortillas fried in coconut oil and layered with salsa, cheese, and fried plantains.  It will either be delicious, or we'll send out for pizza.

I like that Blue Apron includes a card called "from the farm" which either gives you information about a specific ingredient in your parcel, or tells you something about the local farm from whence it comes.

For so long I have been so incredibly bored planning and fixing the same thing night after night, but watching Food Network and cooking Blue Apron meals have given me a new lease on my cooking life.  I even used a $100 Amazon gift certificate recently to buy a top of the line frying pan.  I've always gotten the cheap kind and replaced it with another cheap one when it began to wear out, and I have discovered that you get what you pay for.  This new pan is like night and day from what I have been using for years.

I won't say I wouldn't like to go out for dinner every night instead of cooking, but at least I'm now enjoying both cooking and definitely the finished product more than I have for many years.

Who DID the Cooking?

The prompt for today is;

Who did most of the cooking in your house when you were growing up?

My mother, definitely.  Until I was in high school, she was a stay at home mom and even after she got a job with the Bank of America, it was only a couple of days a week, to start, so she was home the rest of the time.  She not only cooked dinner every night, but also fixed breakfast and packed our lunches to take to school.  Never did figure out why bologna sandwiches always had mayonnaise and salami sandwiches came with butter, but to this day I often fix them that way.

We had a lot of take out food, too.  Pizza (which we picked up at the local pizza joint in North Beach) or Chinese food (which we had delivered).

My father was a meat and potatoes kind of guy (with a big dose of Italian wanna be....he loved anything Italian, though he did not have a drop of Italian blood in him), so we had a lot of roasts (mostly beef) with potatoes and always vegetables, sometimes a salad.  I never did get the "love of veggies" gene, though.

He was a railway mail clerk, which meant he worked the mail on a train from San Francisco to Los Angeles.  This meant he would leave one morning, be gone that night and return the following night.  On the nights he was gone my sister and I often had "dinners" like pancakes, or scrambled eggs, or my favorite, those new Swanson fried chicken TV dinners that had just come out.

I remember I talked my mother into making pancakes with pork gravy for me one morning, after she told me that it was her favorite breakfast as a kid.  I remember really loving it and still don't know why she never fixed it again.  She also made marrow bone dumplings for soup from time to time.  Those were my favorites, but she stopped making them too.

My father liked to experiment in the kitchen, often something Italian.  The very best calzone I ever had was one he made.  I don't know, this many years later, what made it so special, but I've never had another that lived up to what he made.

But he was best known for his potato salad.  I have not had one since that was the same.  He said that the secret was slicing the potatoes very thin.  He also used sweet pickles and always Best Food (or Hellman's) mayonnaise and lots of onions and parsley.  I was his taster, letting him know if it needed more salt or not.

I don't make his potato salad because it needs lots of onion and Walt doesn't like onion.  Also because I love it and would eat more than I should.

He was less successful with sweets and once made peanut butter cookies that you could drink.  I don't know whether he added too much liquid (and what liquid do you add to cookies anyway?) or too little flour?  But we teased him unmercifully about those peanut butter cookies for many years.

Oddly, I did not learn to cook when I was growing up.  Perfectionist that she was, my mother never wanted help in the kitchen, or tried to teach us.  She would rather do it herself.  I taught myself to cook by volunteering to cook for a bunch of guys in the house where Walt was living at U.C. Berkeley.  But I think I turned out to be a fair-to-middlin' cook after all.

Who Does the Cooking?

The prompt for today is;

Who does most of the cooking in your home?

That would be a combination of me and Bertolli Italian dinners.  On weekends, when I have a show to review in Sacramento, I haul out one of the reliable Bertolli dinners.  My cousin Kathy recommended them to me years ago when we were talking about the dreary boredom of having to find something to cook for two people every night.  I started buying them and it is now my routine to cook a Bertolli dinner before a show in Sacramento.  I generally don't eat much of it because I'm not usually hungry for pasta, so one bag is plenty for us to have a light dinner so that we are full, but don't fall asleep in whatever show I'm reviewing.

But as a general rule, I do all the cooking, sometimes even preparing it myself!  I used to actually cook, as in "create a meal" when we had kids and foreign guests here, but now that it's only Walt and myself, I still prepare meals most nights, but get lazy and use frozen dinners too.  Why go to the work of making lasagna for two people when Costco has a perfectly good lasagna that will serve us for two nights an all I have to do is heat it up.

Walt always makes is own lunch and gets pretty creative, with either Chinese or hot flavors -- usually a top ramen base with all sorts of vegetables added and then whatever flavor (sesame oil or sirracha) he wants to augment it with.

He rarely cooks dinner, which is fine because he does so much else around the house.  Years ago we found a book of Beer Cookery and he found a recipe for lamb chips with capers and beer that we both loved.  Every five years or so, he'll cook that and I always enjoy it.

The real cook in the family is Tom.  When he was still a kid living at home, he learned to make omelettes and made the best in the family.  We all loved it when Tom could whip up one of his special omelettes.  He was never afraid to try anything.  I once said that I thought he could go into the refrigerator and take out sardines, peanut butter and chopped olives and somehow come up with a dish that would be delicious.  This was in the days before shows like Chopped on the Food Network.  He'd be great on that show!

Then he started working in restaurants and honed his natural abilities as a cook and now whenever we go to visit his family, it's almost always Tom who cooks.  He's a terrific barbeque chef.  And I love that he is teaching Brianna to cook.  She made ... made ... spaghetti the other day.  That's something I've never done.  But he has one of those pasta rollers and he taught her how to use it.  

Ned is also a very good cook, though not quite as adventurous as Tom.  I'm not sure when he started cooking for himself, but he whips up an excellent meal...and is the best party planner around.

Jeri cooks some now, but I think most of the cooking is done by her husband Phil, or they do it together.

Cooking is Trending

There's that new word that seems to be everywhere today -- "trending," meaning what is "hot" right now.  As I was fixing dinner tonight, I realized that cooking seems to be very hot these days.

I remember when Julia Child had the very televised cooking show.  We watched her to see her goofs, watch her wave a butcher knife like a sword, but also to learn the mysteries of French cooking.  I bought her cookbook and may have tried one or two recipes, but it was really more work than I wanted to do.

We loved Joyce Chen, with her mispronounced words (I still think of "oil" as "oir").  Her description of how to cook Peking Duck still ranks up there as one of the programs Char and I remember and laugh about.

And I knew Martin Yan before the rest of the country knew him because he taught classes here in Davis and it was my boss's son who helped him get his first television show. He was flamboyant and a lot of fun, but I also learned to make a pretty decent Chinese meal.

I've always enjoyed watching cooking on TV and learning from it.  I loved Emeril Lagasse, who was the staple on the newly established Food Network, which debuted in 1993.  Again most of his dishes were more complicated than I wanted to make, but I enjoyed watching him work, and yell "BAM" whenever he added his "essence" to the dish he was cooking.

But today cooking has come into its own.  Not only is there the Food Network, but there is also a Cooking Channel (which I believe is the same franchise).  The TV chefs today are more relatable to the average housewife.  Their recipes are easier, but delicious and introduce the home cook to things he or she may not have thought of trying before.  There are cooking contests, and bizarre shows like "Cutthroat Kitchen" where chefs bid on how to make it more difficult for their competitors -- they have to use tiny (or oversized) implement, or can't use the stove, or must cook while on a rocking horse or a tall ladder or something else strange.

Saturday is my day for cooking shows  Starting with Demaris Phillips, who does southern cooking, to Farmhouse Rules, with former chef Nancy Fuller cooking for and playing with her family, to Rea Drummond, the Pioneer Woman, whose blog I followed for years until she got a TV show. (Wouldn't it be nice to have two houses on your property so you can use one of them exclusively to cook in?) Then the kitchen of Trishia Yearwood, who may be the most "home cook" of the bunch and who likes to cook with her friends and family.  There are a host of cooks I like to watch and I usually learn something from all of them, whether a specific recipe, or a technique or something I want to try.

I've also watched the "Next Food Network Star" for so many seasons now that I enjoy seeing "old friends" I rooted for in the competition who now have had their own shows for several years...except maybe Guy Fieri, whose Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives seems to dominate the Food network on the weekends and whose show I have never liked much.

I recently discovered Tiffani Thiessen on the Cooking Channel.  I initially watched her Dinner at Tiffani's because I have enjoyed Thiessen on White Collar and was happy to see that the first friends she would be cooking for included Tim DeKay, her White Collar husband, and Willie Garson, the strange "Mozzie" on the show.  But I discovered that Dinner at Tiffani's was just a fun, low key show with good tasting, easy to make food.

So tonight I made her lemon chicken with rosemary (only I used thyme) and I convinced Walt that with enough bacon (she used pancetta) and balsamic vinegar even he would like Brussels sprouts...and he did.  He had two helpings.

Cooking is definitely trending and what with the hundreds of home cooks posting YouTube videos, this may be the golden age of gastronomy.

Something New

When I go to Atria, I stay almost exactly an hour.  I don't keep track of the time, but it seems that we run out of things to talk about or I can't take one more round of "I'm old, Bev."  Today I was there to pick up laundry and I was telling her I was cooking corn on the cob for dinner.  She groaned. . She loves corn on the cob.  I was thrilled.  I had 3 ears at home, and plenty of chicken so I invited her to come back with me and have dinner at our house.  But she said she has been feeling dizzy lately and didn't want to leave her apartment ("dizzy" is the excuse she uses when she wants to get out of something)

Trying to find something different to talk about, I started telling her that Peach broke her wrist. She had been trying to turn one of her dogs over to the groomer and she went in one direction and the dog in the other and somehow she broke her wrist.  Says it "hurts like hell" but she has a classy tie dye cast.

I was going to try to find the picture of the cast with my phone and then realized....phone!  I could call her.  So I placed a call, turned on the speaker and we could both talk to her.  My mother didn't say much, but she enjoyed listening to the two of us talking.

She (my mother) has a hard time remembering Bob's name these days, and can't remember where they live or why they moved there, but I think it was good for her to hear Peach's voice.

She'll be in the cast for 8 weeks and because she can't help Bob like she usually does he has a motorized scooter to get him to the dining room for meals.  She has someone come in to help her shower twice a week.

By the time the phone conversation was finished and I had gathered up the dirty laundry for the week, my hour was up.  I was sorry not to be bringing her home for corn on the cob, but given how dinner prep went, that may have been for the best.

I was going to fix a good ol' Amurrican dinner of fried chicken, biscuits and the corn.  I usually make biscuits with Bisquick, but decided I wanted to make them from scratch and went to get my little book that has the recipes I refer to most often these days.  It resides in a magazine holder with my Food Network magazines, right next to the recliner.  Only it wasn't there.  It got cleaned up for the party (we are still trying to find things).  I couldn't find it anywhere downstairs so I went to my iPad to look up a recipe and the iPad has been very wonky lately and after 5 minutes it still was searching for "biscuit recipe."  I gave up and used the desktop and found a good recipe right away.  (Walt finally found the box I was looking for upstairs, but it was too late by then.)

All three 3 things I was cooking take about the same amount of time to cook, which was going to be convenient.  I flour my chicken with regular flour, salt and poultry seasoning.  Only after I put the flour in a bag to shake the chicken, I couldn't find my regular poultry seasoning.  I found a brand that wasn't what I wanted, so tried to shake a bit of that into the flour and a huge glop came out.  I tried to remove some of it, but it incorporated into the flour too  quickly.  I decided it probably wouldn't be that bad, so I went to put some salt into the bag as well and instead of a bit of salt about a tablespoon of salt went in.  I gave up, threw that bag away and got another bag, where instead of "shaking" I spooned the seasonings into the flour, and instead of using the poultry seasoning I don't like, I just went with thyme and sage and salt.

So.  Chicken finally floured and in the frying pan, I mixed up the biscuit dough.  Only my pastry cutter was missing, so I had to use forks instead, which worked all right.  At one point, before I started to roll out the dough, I was standing in the kitchen with my arms at my side and Sheila, who eats like she has a tapeworm these days came up and licked my hands.  Back to the sink for another wash.

There were no disasters with the corn.

But it's funny.  It seemed for a moment (though now that I read back on it, it doesn't) that everything was going wrong, starting with the iPad, and a switch turned off in my head.  Though we were having one of my favorite meals, I just wasn't hungry any more.  I ate half of one piece of chicken and half of my corn (though I managed to find room for an ice cream bar for dessert).

Walt was very sweet.  While I watched the unfolding disaster on Last Tango in Halifax (can't those guys ever get a break?) he cleaned up the mess I'd left in the kitchen.  Then, since he has no voice tonight, for reasons which are not yet clear, he went off to bed while I stayed up to see who was going to be booted off the next episode of Next Food Network Star (they made the right choice).

So the night is winding down and I have only written half of each of the two reviews I was working on today. Tomorrow I have an interview for the volunteer position at Sutter Davis Hospital.

A Hunk of Meat

Back in the glory days of Cousins Day, when Peach was healthy, Kathy was alive, and my mother still had most of her marbles, we were having breakfast one morning.  My mother made pancakes and Kathy was in ecstasy and confessed that she loved pancakes, but that she could not make pancakes.

I wondered what she meant.  I mean...my mother mixed Bisquick with milk and eggs, and dropped the batter on a griddle and cooked it.  How hard is that?

But Kathy said that her pancakes were always heavy and that she couldn't get them light, like my mother's to save her soul.

Peach chimed in  and said that the one thing she couldn't make was Jello.  That she had tried all her life but could never get Jello to set. 

Again, she couldn't make Jello?  You add hot water to mix, let it dissolve, add cold water and let it set.  How difficult was that?

While it was beyond my comprehension that my cousins, who were each good cooks, could not make these two simple dishes, I had to admit to myself lately that everyone has a blind spot when it comes to cooking.

I'm a good cook.  I will try anything.  I've cooked multi course Chinese meals. I make bread and pie dough from scratch.  I don't need the Butterball hot line to cook a turkey.  I've made my own ice cream many times.

I'm not afraid to tackle any recipe, maybe not these days when it sometimes just seems like too much work to do something complicated, but given the challenge, I'm willing to give it a go and am not afraid to try.

But there is something I cannot cook.

I cannot cook meat.  

Well, not all meat.  I can roast a leg of lamb or a good beef roast, but I have yet to make a pork dish that I didn't think was a disaster.  I can't cook pork chops or roast without having it turn out dry as a bone.  Even when I cut the cooking time down to half of what it was called for, even if I infuse the meat with lots of flavor from rubs or marinades.  Even if I follow recipes to the letter, my pork comes out dry as a bone.  Flavorful, maybe, but dry as a bone.

I can't cook a steak.  I can cook a medium well done steak, but I like it rare and I can't get it rare.  It's either too overcooked or too chewy.  Even the steaks from Omaha steaks disappoint me because I can't cook them right. I cook at the recommended temperature and let them rest so that the juices absorb back into the meat, yet when I cut into my steak, I've done it again...it just isn't up to what I wanted it to be.

My mother was always a very basic cook.  She wasn't inventive at all.  She had a handful of things that she cooked, but she cooked them better than I ever have.  

I have tried and tried, but can't get a pot roast as tender as she can.  I buy the recommended cut of beef, I sear it all over before cooking, I add all the right ingredients recommended by the chefs on the Food Channel, and I cook it long and slow, yet when I go to cut it, it's stringy and dry, even under the sauce that has flavored it all day.

She also made the very best meat loaf.  Peach always raved about her meat loaf, yet she had no recipe.  She just kind of threw whatever leftovers she had in the fridge together with ground beef.

I've been making meat loaf all of my married life and have never made it as well as my mother did.  You could cut hers into nice neat, well packed slices.  Mine crumbles when you try to slice it.  It tastes just fine, but once again I have failed to achieve what I was aiming for.

I even have a slow cooker which I have used to cook all sorts of things and yes, they taste fine  But they have a "mealy" texture that is not to my liking.

I don't know why I can't cook meat.  I can cook chicken just fine.  I can make macaroni and cheese from scratch without a recipe.  I can strip a turkey carcass and turn it into a delicious soup.  But hand me a steak and I tense up, knowing that I can cook it fine, but that when it gets on the plate and I cut into it, I will be disappointed.

I watched 10 and 11 year olds, barely tall enough to reach the counters, cooking gourmet meals, with knowledge of what they were doing, and then plating them beautifully on Chopped yesterday and I was mortified.

I don't eat much meat these days.  Somehow I just can't eat a whole steak or a whole chop or even a whole slice of meat loaf any more.  The dogs love to sit next to me at dinner because after I've had a bite or two of the meat that has disappointed me, I end up cutting it into pieces and letting them have it.

Walt doesn't seem to be unhappy with my cooking and maybe I'm being overly critical of my efforts.  I can make pancakes to suit me and my Jello always sets properly, but I can't cook a hunk of meat to please me to save my soul.

Gastronomic Inspiration

I am a good cook.  I am a self-taught cook, which has made me kind of fearless.  For some reason, my mother, who was, in her day, quite a good cook, never taught me to cook.  I learned to cook by cooking for the guys who lived in the house where Walt was living.  I was living in a dorm at UC Berkeley at the time and could have eaten there, but liked the experience of making dinners for (?8) for something like $5 a day.  (I'm sure my numbers are off, but the budget was pretty small.)  We ate a lot of breast of lamb (which now costs a fortune, but was 10 cents a pound then).

The thing about me is that I rarely make something "old" for guests.  In the days when we did a lot of entertaining, I always cooked something new when I had invited someone over for dinner.  I know people who will make a complete Thanksgiving dinner before Thanksgiving, just to find out if it will taste OK...and then make the same dinner again on Thanksgiving.

Not me.  I've had some real disasters (don't ever try to cook underripe avocados!), but most of the time things come out well.

Through years of foreign students, and cooking classes, I became pretty good at cooking things from China, Brasil and Chile.  I dabbled in Japanese cooking, made a few recipes that were typically British, and still think Nora's (from Ireland) peas were the best I'd ever tasted.

I read cookbooks the way some people read novels.  When I finish a book I'm reading at Logos before the end of my shift, I will pick up an interesting cookbook and read that.  Sometimes I get ideas.

In the old days I collected cookbooks and once had two floor to near ceiling bookcases filled with cookbooks, but I did a purge awhile ago and got rid of most of them.  Now I have four shelves and a lot more cookbooks than most folks have but just a fraction of what I used to have.  I get most of my recipes on line anyway and a lot of the books I keep for sentimental reasons (could I throw away the book that my old roommate and I shared in the 60s...our bible in those days? or Trifles from Tiny Tots?).   Most of them have one recipe that I know I have made frequently (Lamb Soup of the Middle East, Walt's beer lamb chops, Burgundy beef balls, my favorite recipe for lemon meringue pie, etc, for example) so I keep the whole book.

Nowadays, with no kids in the house and our "entertaining" made difficult thanks to the three fur persons who live with us, I don't do all that fancy stuff any more.  I pretty much have a stock of easy standard recipes and repeat them over and over again (like Joe Special, which is hamburger browned, with garlic, mixed with cooked spinach, scrambled eggs and Parmesan cheese, or macaroni and cheese, which I make from scratch, without a recipe).

I love that cooking shows are so plentiful...and accessible these days.  By "accessible," I mean that in the days of Julia Child, who started the whole TV chef business, the things you learned to make seemed complex and something that was daunting.  Now we still have chefs, but also home-cooks, like Rachel Ray, Ree Drummond (the Pioneer Woman) and country singer Trisha Yearwood, who make really good food that you might never think of making, but who make it the way the home cook would, with stuff that you probably have in your cupboard.

I watch cooking shows the way I used to read cookbooks, for entertainment and maybe a little inspiration.  If I see a dish that looks good, I can go on line and find the recipe for it, and then adapt it to whatever I have in my cupboard or refrigerator.

On Saturday mornings, I often just turn on the Food Network and let it run all day.  If I overhear them talking about a recipe that sounds interesting, or a technique that I have never used, I'll sit down and watch and then go to the Food Network web site and find the recipe.

I covet Ree Drummond's kitchen.  Even if I could afford to keep my kitchen stocked as completely as she does, I dont have nearly the cupboard space to put it all.  No matter what she goes to cook, she seems to have a great stock of the ingredients needed to make it (of course I know that some of it is "television" too!  But it really is her kitchen in which they film...I remember it from the days when she was just a food blogger before the Food Network had ever heard of her.

She made a great herb butter to put on steaks the other day and I had to try it.  Lemme tell you, I can make a great 7 course Chinese meal and make my own baklava, churn my own ice cream, and make my own pizza dough, but what I can't do to satisfy myself, is cook a steak.  I dunno if it's my cooking or that I don't know how to shop for a good piece of beef.   I've been cooking steak for 60 years and never like the way it turns out.   But I made this butter, which is butter whipped together with parsley, garlic, red pepper flakes, lemon zest and lemon juice and then rolled into a ball and put in the fridge until firm. When the steaks are done, you slice off a chunk of the butter and put it on top of the cooked steak, letting it melt into the meat.  Lemme tell you, I loved it.  Definitely improved the meat (which I still wasn't thrilled with).

This weekend, I caught the Celebrity cookoff, with team Rachel Ray vs. team Guy Fieri.  Not a show I'd ever seen before (and probably won't watch again), but this time they were making food to sell at the beach and Florence Henderson won the cometition with a hot dog she had "frosted" with dijon mustard, wrapped in a slice of pastrami.  Then you grill it for 4 minutes on each side, put in a warm bun and top with her special cole slaw.  

I decided to make that for dinner.  Right away, I dropped the coleslaw because Walt doesnt like cole slaw.  Then I decided to wrap the hot dogs in bacon, since we didn't have pastrami. I also had no dijon, so used Mendocino Mustard.   And ecause I wasn't going to top the bun with cole slaw, I warmed a piece of Swiss cheese in it when I was warming the bun.  The end result was tasty--nothing like what Florence Henderson made, but she had given the inspiration to experiment on my own.

That's pretty much what I do with just about every recipe I try.   So far, I haven't received many complaints.

Finger Lickin' Good

When Walt and I were engaged and planning a life together, I remember seeing a picture in Gourmet Magazine (to which I subscribed at the time).  It was a simple picture of an orange, partially peeled, sitting on a plate with a strawberry on top of it.  I thought it was the epitome of a fancy presentation, showed it to him, and said that when we were married, this was the kind of meal I would make for him....meaning that my meals would all be beautiful presentations.

Needless to say, in the past 47 years, I have made my share of beautiful meals and offered beautiful presentations (but, I have to say, never an orange with a strawberry on it). 

I'm not afraid to try anything.  I never once "practiced" a new recipe before serving it to unsuspecting guests. I always made it cold (not temperature, but without practice) and hoped for the best.  Most of the time, even though disasters might have happened during the preparation, the end result turned out well.  Not always, though.  You might like to read about one of my more memorable disasters.

During our ten years having foreign students in and out all the time, I learned to cook meals from several different cultures and even, once, had to teach our Japanese visitor how to make tempura, since she didn't have a clue how to do it.

But over the years, the joy of creating something new, delicious and beautiful begins to fade.  Especially when you have children and you know that at least one of them (if not all of them) will hate what you serve, no matter what it is.  Nothing more depressing than to work on a meal all afternoon and have at least one of the recipient say "Yuck" and refuse to eat it.

(Amazingly, the kids grew up and became gourmet cooks.  Either I was an inspiration or they learned to cook to finally get something to eat that they actually liked.)

With only two of us to cook for now (yes, I cook almost every night), my repertoire has shrunk to things like "something with hamburger in it," "something with cheese in it," stuffed potatoes, "something Mexican" a "tuna thing," and, on nights when I have to review a show, Bertolli frozen pasta entrees.

But occasionally I get inspired.  This week I got a flyer trying to get me to subscribe to a cooking magazine.  The flyer came with beautiful photos and delicious sounding recipes.  I chose several recipes from the magazine and made a list of food, deciding to make special things this week.  The first was the orange glazed salmon steak that I made the other night.  It was good, but I forgot that I don't really like salmon.

I had also planned on making a coq au vin.  I had all the ingredients and the recipe I was going to use involved the crock pot and several hours cooking time.

But I kept forgetting to make it until too late.  I was worried that the chicken would start to go bad, so today was the day I was going to finally do it.  Only it got to be 3 p.m. before I remembered and again it was too late.  Instead, I went looking for a non-crock pot version.  I finally settled on this recipe from Ina Garten, the Barefoot Contessa.  Even having chosen that recipe, it was 5 p.m.before I thought about it and I decided it was too late to make it.  I decided on something else, but then thought about the fact that Walt will be at the opera tomorrow night and I'll be at Cousins day the next night, and I will be home too late the following day to make it, and the chicken would DEFINITELY have gone bad by then, so what the heck.  I decided to cook it anyway and we'd just eat late.

It's one of those recipes that involve several pots and pans lots of chopping, fresh herbs, brandy and wine.  But it starts with a Dutch oven.   It just so happens that I have a cast iron Dutch oven that doesn't get nearly enough use.  It was my father's.  When he died he had every possible cast iron skillet known to man, but his kitchen was such an unbelievably filthy mess that the cast iron -- all of it -- was so caked with months of grease that we could hardly bear to touch it to throw it away.  Oh, how it killed me to throw all that beautiful cast iron away!

I did decide to salvage the Dutch oven.  It took a long time...a very long time...to get the layers of baked on grease removed (and to this day, more than 20 years later, it still has a bit of black on the outside that won't come off), but it finally became usable.

So I cooked the bacon and then cooked the onions and carrots and then thought to find out if we had some brandy.  Walt didn't think we did, but finally located a very old bottle hidden in a box upstairs.  Voila!  Brandy!

I drove the dogs nuts browning the chicken (because they could smell it and wanted some), but I finally got it all put together and in the oven, to cook for 40 minutes.  Then I thickened with a roux of butter and flour, sauteed the mushrooms and added those, simmered a bit longer and finally, at 8:30 (not unusually late for us to eat) it was ready to be served.  I was going to take a picture, but was too anxious to get at it, so all I got was what was left in the pot after I'd served the two of us.

 
I was quite jazzed about it.  It was just delicious.  I'd forgotten how good a really good meal could be and I'm wondering if it's going to inspire me to continue "preparing meals" rather than just "making dinner" for awhile!

Recipe for Decluttering

I received a notice from the SPCA that its thrift shop is in need of donations.  I also know that Logos (the book store) can always use book donations, so I decided to start filling boxes to donate.  I figure if I do even a shelf a day, that's a shelf a day I didn't do before.

I started with cleaning out cookbooks.   There was a time when I collected cookbooks.  Lots of cookbooks. But I find that I rarely use any of them now because it's so easy to just google ingredients or recipe when I'm looking for inspiration.

So I got rid of an entire shelf of Weight Watcher books (some dating back to when WW was first started).  I can't remember when I last opened one and even should I be so inspired to need them again, I could get whatever I wanted on the internet.  That filled almost a whole banker's box right there.  I also included some books that I know I will never look at again.

I was in the midst of sorting through cookbooks when Walt panicked and asked what had become of his beer cookbook. "Beer Cookery" is one of those books which I will always keep, even if only for one recipe.  

I don't think we have used the "Beer Cookery" (published in London in 1957) for anything but the recipe for "chops" (we use lamb chops) which Walt makes every few years. This year he made it for my birthday.  

Here's the recipe:

1/2 pint ale
2 eggs
capers
vinegar (tarragon is excellent here)
nutmeg, lemon, parsley, seasoning

Fry the chops--well seasoned--in the ordinary way, and drain off the fat into a basin.  Pour the ale into the frying pan, season again, and simmer gently until the chops are tender.  When this has happened, take the chops out of the pan and put aside to keep hot.
     Pour the liquor from the pan into a basin, add a little vinegar, some capers, the yolks of the eggs, a grate of nutmeg and a pinch of salt.
     Beat this up well and add it to the fat that you drained off from the chops.  Pour all back into the frying pan and stir until the sauce thickens, when you should pour it over the chops.
     Serve the chops garnished with a slice of lemon and a spring of parsley.

Other books that I keep, even if for only one recipe, include a soup book where I get my wonderful lamb soup of the Middle East, the pie book I always use for lemon meringue pie, and a bread cookbook that I bought long before I ever had a bread machine.  I would also never give away my Women's Day Encyclopedia of Cooking (12 volumes) or my Good Housekeeping cookbook that I received for a bridal shower gift.  It was my bible--I liked it much better than "Joy of Cooking"--for many years.

I haven't made a huge dent in the collection, by a long shot, but I have rearranged things, dusted things, and freed up at least half a shelf.  It's a good start. 

Shrove Tuesday

About the only homage to Lent that I pay these days is serving pancakes for breakfast.  And I did.  Homemade from scratch were some of the best pancakes I've made in a long time.  I also realized that I would be working this afternoon and decided to make a crock pot recipe.  I looked up Shrove Tuesday recipes for the crock pot and found one for gumbo that sounded pretty tasty so I rushed out and got about $100 worth of ingredients and got all started cooking before I went off to Logos.

I decided to read a mystery today, and when I saw there were several Brother Cadfael books, I chose one of them.

I had read one of these Ellis Peters books before...and I loved the TV series, starring Derek Jacobi.  This turned out to be just the right size book and I finished it in 3 hours, leaving me a whole hour to read a second book.

It was like reading News of the Weird, containing snippet after snippet of weird things that people have done.  Like the guy known as the "Gloucester Jew," who lived in Scotland in the 18th century and fell in an open toilet, but wouldn't let anybody rescue him because it was Saturday, which was his Sabbath and nobody was supposed to work on the Sabbath.  The next day was Sunday, but that was the Sabbath for the Christians, and they couldn't work on that day.  By Monday, the man had died.

There was also a story Jeri and Phil would appreciate of a man who spent 3 hours digging out a parking space for his car, only to discover that when he went to get his car someone else had taken the space.  He shot her.

Stuff like that.

It was also a fun day at the book store.  One woman bought thirteen of the $1 bargain books that are outside the shop and 7 of the bargain books inside the shop, then came back and bought another big book about sunflowers and Van Gogh's paintings.  While I was trying to ring up her charge, a guy wandered around the shop talking to me nonstop.  We had started comparing notes on various crime dramas we had read and how people warned Ken Follett he would end his career if he took a break from crimes to write "Pillars of the Earth," which, this guy informs me, is consistently a best seller in Germany and is Follett's best known book.  

It was awkward doing a sale and keeping a conversation going at the same time.

Another guy came in to order a book and was disappointed that we don't order new books because he hates the independent book store in town ("They're Republicans," he sneered!) and didn't want to patronize it, but didn't see any other alternative, since Borders closed.

While I worked my last hour, Walt was in the new Irish pub which has just opened up in town.  He has one beer and then comes to pick me up.  It was perfect timing, since I had just about finished my second book and was sitting there chatting with Adrian, who had come to relieve me.

On the walk back to the car, we passed this sign for another new business in town.   Whoda thunk.  I don't think I'll be volunteering at this business!

It was also a fun mail day, fortunately, with two great birthday cards from the granddaughters, and some fun post cards, including a list of 10 things I should do if I am ever in Belarus (like "try Narochansky bread," "Polish off all the draniki you can," "Taste krambabulia," and "try on a true flax outfit."

The house was filled with the aroma of gumbo when we came home.   Dinner was almost finished the first cooking part, so I added Orzo pasta, turned up the heat for another 15 minutes, and sat down to watch Jeopardy.  

Just about the time final Jeopardy came on, it was time to add the fresh shrimp I'd purchased that morning (1 lb of it!) and let it heat up.  Then just as the last question was answered, dinner was ready.

The gumbo was delicious and there was enough of it that it will also make our dinner for tomorrow.  I had also gone out and bought larger bowls to serve it in and I was very happy with the presentation.

 The evening ended with relaxing in front of the television set and, quite frankly, I had to drag myself to the office to write this entry!

Visions of Sugarplums

Before writing for the challenge, I wanted to share that my new blogging friend is Michelle, a young homeschooling mother, and one of the Compassion sponsors. Michelle works so hard finding sponsors for children and her family has sponsored many children. Her favorite is Precious, in Ghana. Through Precious, Michelle has developed such a love of the country and of the children there. She was recently able to send a package with another Compassion sponsor to her Precious and then came the opportunity to travel herself to Ghana with a group next year. Because finances are a problem for her, she decided to ask if people would be willing to help her make her dream come true. I encourage you to read her story and decide if this is something you might be willing to help, with a donation of any small amount.

Topic #7
Christmas Dessert / Treat Recipe

So many choices, so little time!

In my house when I was growing up, I remember my mother making lots of cookies at Christmas time. One of the ones I remember the most was a cookie which had an orange flavor to it, the dough was rolled into a ball and coated with chopped walnuts and then a candied cherry (or it may have been a bit of jam) was put in an indent in the center before baking. I loved those cookies.

Years later, when I thought to go to my mother for all of my favorite recipes that she made while I was growing up, I learned that she decided that she never cooked "like that" any more, she just threw the book away. This is the pain of being an Aquarian born to a Virgo! All of her special recipes, the ones that she hand wrote in there so she wouldn't forget them, just tossed in the garbage without a word to me. I have never been able to recreate the bittersweet chocolate frosting she made to go on the chocolate cream roll that I loved--and believe me I've tried (and I no longer cook "like that" either so don't bother sending me recipes!)

When I had my own apartment and my own office, I made a big deal out of Christmas and made lots and lots of cookies for a week-long open house. I made drop cookies, cut-out cookies, molded cookies...if it had "cookie" in the name, I probably made it at some time or other. My office was the most popular place in the building, and I probably gained 5 lbs myself, what with both baking the cookies and then eating them when nobody was around!

But the cookie that will always say "Christmas" to me, no matter what time of year it is served, are what my mother called "Goodness Sake Cookies" (because everyone who tasted them for the first time loved them so much they would say something like "goodness sakes, these are good!"). She had gone to a party one year and had these cookies and just loved them, got the recipe and came home to bake them. We all loved them.

Years later, when I went looking for a recipe, I discovered that they were really Mexican Wedding Cakes, but I still think of them as Goodness Sake Cookies. The recipe calls for pecans and you can substitute walnuts, but really they aren't the real deal without pecans.

Goodness Sake Cookies

* 1 cup butter, softened
* 8 tablespoons confectioners' sugar
* 2 cups all-purpose flour
* 2 cups chopped pecans
* 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C).
2. Mix all the ingredients together with a mixer until well blended. Roll dough into round small balls (you can place close together on a cookie sheet, because they won't spread)
3. Bake for 10-12 minutes.
4. Roll in additional confectioners' sugar while still warm (use two forks to roll the cookies so you don't burn your fingers) and put on rack to cool completely.

If you've never had these before, you will find yourself saying, "goodness sakes! these are so good!"

Feeling Kneaded

In my new frenzy to join everything and send something to everyone in the world, I joined a recipe exchange on Swap-Bot earlier this week. The idea was to send five recipes to four different people and to include a comment about why you chose that recipe, or what was special about it. The hope was that people would go through their vaults and choose recipes that had been in the family for a long time and had good stories behind them.

I turned to my cookbook bible, Trifles from Tiny Tots, now raggedy edged and spotted with stains, the way a well-loved cookbook should be.

When our kids were in nursery school we would occasionally have parties and all brought food. Char and I often made Mexican won ton, a recipe we found in Sunset magazine. It was always a HUGE hit.

Mexican Won Ton 1/2 lb hamburger 1/2 lb chorizo sausage 1 small can chopped green chili 2 green onions 1/4 cup jack cheese 1 pkg won ton skins (available in the oriental section of the supermarket, or in the produce section of some supermarkets) Remove casing from sausage and crumble. Add to hamburger and brown meats. Add onion and chili and cheese, stirring until cheese melts. Let cool. Place one tsp of filling in the center of a won ton skin and fold, sealing the edges with water. Deep fry until golden brown. Serve hot with guacamole (home made or store bought--home made is better). These may be made ahead and frozen. When ready to serve, place on a cookie sheet and heat at 250 degrees for 30 minutes.

So many people asked us for the recipe that when a fund raiser discussion came up, we suggested that we make a school cookbook. Char and I volunteered to be on the committee and the two of us decided that this book would be great because it would give us the opportunity to put all of our favorite recipes in one place so we would always know where to find them. Char's evil and potent "velvet hammer," for example.

Velvet Hammer 1 bottle champagne 1 bottle soda 1 bottle white wine 1/2 pt vodka 1 oz orange curacao Mix all together. Put in punch bowl with block of ice.

The punch was lethal and many people woke up with hangovers the next day after indulging in the Velvet Hammer without realizing they had reached the point of no return.

And so I turned to Trifles from Tiny Tots to pick out my favorite recipes to include in the swap. The thing that struck me most forcibly as I went through it is how I don't cook like this any more. I recognized a lot of recipes I used to make, but haven't made in years--too complicated.

I particularly remembered all the fancy breads that I used to make ("You used to make bread and we didn't appreciate it nearly enough. Thank you!," said an unsolicited message from Jeri this morning. Just the thing to make my day!).

I still make bread, occasionally, but I make white bread and I put it in a bread maker, so my part is just adding ingredients and pushing a button. But back in the day, Char, Pat and I used to go to a specialty store where we bought all sorts of different flours (I used to love cracked wheat) and other ingredients and we really made most of our own bread. (I remember that there was a character on a soap opera in those days who seemed to be making bread every time she was on the screen--and she NEVER got the hang of kneading bread dough. It drove me nuts.)

I made bread at least twice a week, sometimes more and spent a lot of time bend over the breadboard kneading dough (which I don't do any more). I heard once that the quickest way to get the gluten active was to throw the dough down on the board as hard as possible. We had a shy sheltie in those years and he would run and hide whenever I started throwing the dough around.

My staple was Cuban Water bread, which just had yeast, water, sugar, salt and flour, but I used potato water and it turned out huge, probably because you started it in a cold oven and so it continued to rise as it began to bake. It also had a fabulous flavor.

There was also a quick loaf bread which rose faster because it used more yeast, and it had a different flavor because the sweet element in it was honey, rather than regular sugar.

Refrigerator potato bread was great because you could keep the dough in the fridge for up to 10 days and use it for loaf bread or for rolls.

But I think my favorite was Whole Wheat Spiced bread because it got its flavor from cumin, one of my favorite spices.

Char also got tired of making turkey stuffing, so developed a recipe for "stuffing bread" where all you had to do was cut it up and add liquid and stuff the turkey--this was before you could buy pre-seasoned bread cubes in the supermarket.

I rarely bake bread now because it's just Walt and me and if I make bread, he eats a slice and I finish the loaf, which is exactly what I shouldn't do.

But I do remember those days, fondly (even though the kids probably remember that I spent them all yelling) and it was really special when Jeri thought to write that note this morning.

Like Mother Used to Make

You'd never find my mother making creme brulée or Beef Wellington or attempting to roll sushi. She was not an adventurous cook, but she was a wonderful cook. She cooked mostly good old amurrican food, but did it beautifully and some things I have never been able to duplicate (though (can make creme brulée!)

She was a meat-and-potatoes cook. "Adventurous" was cooking rice. She was also big on things like spaghetti and lasagna. My father loved Italian food and often said he felt he had Italian blood (though he was of Irish and German descent). Most of the "unusual" Italian food I remember eating was made by my father, who liked to cook from time to time. I still remember his calzone, and haven't had another one as good since. When it came to pizza, though, we would order from a store. I don't know if they delivered, but my father would always go and pick it up. We usually had anchovies on our pizza, which I liked then and occasionally like now (though my preference is Italian sausage and mushrooms).

I was thinking about my mother's cooking today because of a couple of odd things she made for us. We had unusual things when my father was out of town (several days a week). Karen and I loved pineapple salad. She would put a couple of rings of pineapple on a bed of lettuce (I usually didn't eat the lettuce...not my favorite food) and then make a dressing of pineapple juice mixed with peanut butter. I loved it. Still do. And every now and then I make it for myself today.

The other weird thing I remember was pancakes with pork gravy. I remember her talking about how much she loved pancakes with pork gravy when she was a kid and I begged her to make it for me. So she did. In truth, I didn't like it all that much, but I raved about how good it was. I guess she could tell I was trying to make her feel good because she never made that breakfast for me again, though I asked for it several times.

My cousin Peach was always asking her for her recipe for meatloaf, which my mother could never share because she claims she never made it the same way twice. She just made it by mixing ground beef with whatever vegetables were left over in the refrigerator.

I have never been able to duplicate her pot roast. It had a mild spicy flavor and was so tender. I remember she cooked it in the Dutch oven for hours. I've tried many times to make it the way she did, but it never comes out right. I can make you a 7 course gourmet Chinese meal, but I can't make a post roast to suit me!

Sadly, she has now forgotten all those recipes. She can't even remember how to make her signature potato salad, and I find her stuffed eggs (which she is always asked to take to parties) to be too salty to suit my taste.

It would have been easy to pass along those recipes to me because they were all in one big cookbook which was pre-printed, but had her handwritten recipes in them too. But in one of those damn Virgo moves, she decided she wasn't going to cook any more and threw the thing away, without asking me if I wanted it. I wanted it!!!

I do OK in the kitchen, when I want to, but if I had to assemble a batch of "family favorite recipes" I would be hard pressed to do it. I don't think there were any favorites. There are a couple of recipes Walt likes (Burgundy beef balls is one of them), but I don't think there is any recipe that my kids ask me to make because they have good memories about it. They would probably have more memorable memories of my cooking if I had, like my mother, stuck to a few simple, but very good, recipes.

Mama Mia, that's a Spicy Meatball

Remember the old Alka-Selzer commercial about the guy eating the spicy meatballs?

I thought about that a lot last night as I downed milk and plain rice to cut the burning in my throat.

For a long time the station that I kept on the TV here in my office as white noise in the background while I worked was the Food Network. I became friends with Rachael Ray, Paula Deen, Giada deLaurentis and Ina Garten. I didn't actually watch the shows, but I listened to them as I worked (unless, of course, I was transcribing something).

The thing that happened during those days is that I kind of absorbed some cooking ideas, got suggestions for things to cook for dinner, became more adventurous in "winging it," and I think that our mealtimes were more interesting.

Then came the presidential campaign and The Food Network was replaced by MSNBC, CNN, and other news shows.

When I finally was so sicked by politics, and needed a great diversion I discovered marathons. NCIS marathons, House marathons, Criminal Minds marathons, and marathons of several version of Law and Order. I see more bloodshed and sick criminals in a month than probably most law enforcement officers see in a typical year!

But sometimes there are no marathons and so I go searching for something else. At the same time that I was needing a new station to watch, I found the Cooking Channel, a new entry into the field of cable television. It wasn't as formal as the Food Network and I liked its hominess, so I started using food and cooking as white noise again. It even had familiar faces -- Emeril Lagassse and Mario Batali, who had left the Food Network, Graham Kerr whom I used to watch decades ago and hadn't seen in all this time. There were tapes from the late Julia Child and the delightful Two Fat Ladies (one of whom has died). And who doesnt love Nigella Lawson's sensual approach to food?

The other day I happened on a show by Indian chef Anjum Anand, whose program is called "Indian Food Made Easy." I love Indian food, but don't cook it much.

The dish she was making was curried meatballs. We love curry and she described all the spice blends so thoroughly that my mouth was watering. I even had garam masala on my spice rack. I was all set.

So after Jeopardy was over, I set rice to cooking in the rice cooker and started making the meatballs:

1 pound ground meat (pork, beef or veal)
1/4 cup bread crumbs
1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
2 tablespoons tamarind pulp (I substituted Worcestershire, which was suggested)
1 tablespoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon fennel seeds
1 teaspoon crushed coriander seeds
1 teaspoon salt
1 egg

Sounds pretty innocent, doesn't it? After the meatballs were formed and cooked in oil, I made the sauce:

2 tablespoons grapeseed oil
2 tablespoons chopped fresh garlic
1 green chile, minced
3 bay leaves
1 tablespoon garam masala
1 tablespoon dried oregano
1 teaspoon turmeric
Pinch salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons tamarind pulp
4 tomatoes, chopped
1 cup red wine

Again, it didn't sound all that bad. I substituted Worcestershire for the tamarind pulp here too. I used mild green chilis, which have flavor, and almost no heat at all.

When the sauce was all assembled, I returned the meatballs to the sauce and let reheat. Looked great!

Smelled great with all the combination of spices. I took a small taste and realized it was pretty spicy, so I poured myself a glass of milk to go with the meal and served myself the rice plain so as to sop up the heat.

Walt took a bite and his eyebrows went up as he said that it tasted very good.

That was before the steam started pouring out his ears.

We ate in silence, each of us trying to find ways to calm the burning spice in our mouths. We drank a lot of ice water (realizing that ice water does nothing for spicy heat...but it felt good at the time!). In truth, I didn't think it was hotter than some of the Thai food I've seen Walt eat, but I'm not a big fan of anything other than mild spice.

There were leftovers. I suspect neither of us is going to eat them. Needless to say, this is not a recipe I will be making again!

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Parking Ticket update: I called the parking ticket office and spoke with Robin XX, who treated me like putrid meat and said she wouldn't be able to deal with me until tomorrow. The saga continues...

Aarti Party

I do love the cooking shows, some of them, particular shows like Top Chef and The Next Food Network Star. I like the competition and enjoy seeing what chefs can whip up on a moment's notice.

I was in a store once and saw a cookbook of recipes from The Next Food Network Star and I was tempted to buy it, but then realized that they rarely cook the way I would cook. Their ingredients are esoteric, and I'm just not at a time of my life where I am necessarily inspired to cook most of the foods that they serve, though I certainly wouldn't mind being on the tasting panel!

While I enjoy Top Chef, the contestants are already chefs and so it's just a battle to see who can outcook the other, but they already have their specialties and a certain "name."

The Next Food Network Star, on the other hand, pits a bunch of relatively unknown cooks against one another and tries to determine which has the "it" factor that will make them stars on the Food Network.

The Food Network is something that I often put on in the background when I'm doing something else. I sometimes am inspired by dishes I see, other times it goes way over my head. But I've come to realize that being a Food Network star doesn't guarantee great food.

The first Food Network star that drew me was Paula Deen (oh how I wish Diane were alive...because we discussed Paula Deen a lot over the years). How can someone who is a foodaholic not like someone whose principal ingredient is butter and who isn't concerned one whit about calorie content. Paula Deen has that southern charm and is someone who pulled herself up by the bootstraps.

I have tried several of Deen's recipes and have yet to try one that I actually liked. Oh they were OK, but nothing of the mouth-watering goodness that the salivating Ms. Deen promised. In time, I got tired of the fawning over her "boys" (though her sons seem like nice people) and I just lost interest in Paula Deen.

Rachael Ray's food, when I tried it, was always good and easy but her eternal perkiness wore me out so I stopped watching her too.

I like Giada deLaurentis and the Barefoot Contessa. Their foods are a bit more complex and things that I might make if I want to spend a little extra time for a special occasion.

The glutton in me loves Guy Fieri's Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. I remember when Fieri was one of the contestants on Food Network Star. With his bleached white spiked hair and unusual mannerisms, he was an unlikely winner, but I have to admit that he has taken his win and parlayed it into a real television persona (now with his own game show to host on one of the other networks). But Diners, Drive-ins and Dives is all the worst-for-you food that you could imagine, in huge proportions, dripping off Fieri's hands as he tastes it and you just know that it's gooood. The sort of food I wouldn't dare order in a restaurant, but I love living vicariously.

We're getting to the end of this round of Next Food Network Star and there are only five contestants left to battle it out. I have to admit that I've settled on Aarti Sequeira as my favorite of this season (I didn't even know she shared a last name with our son-in-law until Walt pointed it out to me).

From the beginning, Aarti had that sparkle that the camera loves and most of the time she's had a good on-camera presence. She would call her show, if she gets it, "Aarti Party."

She brings an Indian flair to everything she cooks and since I love Indian food, when the contestants cook from week to week it's Aarti's food that I most want to try. How does Ground Lamb Kofto Kebabs with Pomegranate glaze, Bengali spiced potatoes, and Persian Cucumber riata sound? Then there were the Indian spiced tri-tip tacos with caraway basmati rice and tangy tomato sauce, which reminds me of our Mexican daughter's restaurant, which serves Punjabi Pizza, my favorite thing on the menu (her husband is Indian).

Last week she made a "green chicken curry" that looked very good, so when Walt returned from his latest trip to Santa Barbara last night, I cooked it. I figured that with all that cilantro and all that mint, it had to be good. I also had a package of naan bread mix that I'd bought a long time ago, so I made that too. I will admit that it's been a long time since I'd cooked anything somewhat complicated and it was kind of fun, even if the sweat was running down my face and into my eyes as I tried to get everything done in the time required.

The end result was delicious

I do need a bit more practice making naan...I thought I had the dough thin enough, but it was heavy and tough, though tasty. However, the chicken, even though I'd forgotten to add the yogurt at the last minute, was very good.

Best of all, the dish gave me a chance to use the little bowls I bought for spices awhile ago,

which made my mise en place more efficient. (That sounds like I know what I'm talking about--just means getting all the ingredients together before you start to cook. I'm usually the one rummaging wildly for the cinnamon when it's time to add it, only to discover that we are out of it! Even doing the pre-work that I did, I still forgot the yogurt!)

I don't know if Aarti will ultimately win The Next Food Network Star, but I'm hoping she will. My next favorite, Herb, who is a very likeable guy, just isn't unique enough for my tastes and I probably would not watch his show, if he were to win it all. But in the meantime, I may try more of Aarti's recipes while they are still on the Food Network site.