Oh Poop

Ned would be so proud. The thing we talked about more than almost anything else this Cousins Day was poop.

It started on the ride down when we were discussing the new Oprah Winfrey Network. Kathy happened to mention that Dr. Oz said that a normal person should be pooping 6-9 times a day. We were all shocked.

Things went downhill from there.

We talked about the Oprah show that had been devoted to poop, and the pros and cons of colon cleansing. After that pretty much everything somehow all got back to poop.

We sat and chatted when we first arrived, as usual, getting caught up on each other's lives since our last Cousins Days.

My mother had fixed a salad and a huge roll for lunch and then we cleared the table and got down to business. The cards were weird this time, at least weird for me.

Kathy tried to appeal to our pity, pointing out how few games she has won this year but we told her that didn't cut it...65 is a cuthroat game. (I also haven't figured out how to cheat, even if I wanted to).

The language of 65 poured forth. My mother's favorite "oh for crying out soft," and Peach's "things are getting very seri-eye" I don't know that Kathy and I have favorite 65 saying that aren't 4-letter words.

We played two games (my mother won one and I won the other) and then Kathy and I each took a nap. When we woke up, it was time for hors d'oeuvres and drinks while we played more.

Kathy made fantastic stuffed mushrooms (only the sausage could have used a bit more maple flavoring...)

and I made something called an Apple Pie Martini, which blends vanilla liqueur, vodka, apple cider and cinnamon and really does taste something like an apple pie.

After another game (which Peach won), we had Peach's crock pot chicken dinner

There were more games after dinner, the last of which Kathy won. Kathy worked a puzzle while the rest of us watched the pilot espisode of Harry's Law, which, if you didn't see it, was excellent. I recommend it highly. But then I like anything Kathy Bates is in.

This morning over breakfast, Kathy won 2 more games, so I guess maybe the pity was kicking in after all. My mother was not happy that the level of coins in her little coin pot was way down.

We set a date for the February Cousins day, which will come between Kathy's birthday and mine and will include a trip to the Spinnaker restaurant in Sausalito to spend the fund we collect each month for just such a field trip.

Then the 3 cousins headed home into a beautiful sunny day (it had been very foggy on the ride home). When I got here, I found the dogs had found the stuffed dog I had saved for future puppies and had thoroughly enjoyed it.

All in all a very satisfactory Cousins Day (though none of us had 6 bowel movements, I don't believe)...and it was delightful to learn that three of the next generation, who all live in Marin County have decided to have their own cousins day. The torch is being passed!

Polite Society

There are probably only 3 social events where discussing feces is considered acceptable dinnertime conversation for polite society.

The first would possibly be some sort of medical conference, probably gastroenterological, unless wives were present.

The second would be any gathering of young parents, with either babies in diapers or toddlers toilet training.

The third is an SPCA dinner.

And so it was that Walt and I were seated at an SPCA "thank you, volunteers" dinner last night discussing house-breaking, the size and consistency of various dogs' poops, and whether Pergo is REALLY good for dogs, because can't fluid leak through the connections and cause the boards to swell?

Animal people--you gotta love 'em. Conversation is always so...basic.

The party was held at the Senior Center and was catered by Woodstock Pizza, with assistance from Costco. So there were pizzas galore, lots of cheeses and crackers, salads, and lots of goodies like cookies, red velvet cupcakes, and mini candy bars. Lots and lots of drinks and lots and lots of really nice people. ("People who love animals are really nice people," Walt said was we were leaving the party.)

I had thought of bringing one of the puppies, but decided it would be a pain to have to worry about a puppy...and was glad when I saw the sign on the Senior Center door that no pets were allowed (despite which there was a dog there).

There were lots of door prizes and everybody got four tickets to put in the cups of different objects of collections that were being given away, for the drawing later. Walt gave me his tickets to deposit for him. He won two things, I won nothing. I made my choices based on what would be good for either the puppies or Brianna. I'm happy with what we brought home. The puppies were happy with a new stuffed dog, and I hope Brianna will be happy.

I did give away a large red dog collar Walt won, though, since it was too large for Sheila and this guy and his partner are presently fostering a huge pit bull mix.

...and as if they read my mind, I woke up this morning and found that on the 3rd day of Christmas someone brought to me: three poopy puppies. Patty is having a bit of diarrhea and had left a big pool of goop on the floor of their play yard, which all three of them had walked through before playing with each other. I'm not sure when during the night they did it, because it was dried on their fur when I woke up. All three had to have a bath.

And what they did to the new stuffed dog we got for them last night shouldn't happen to...well...a dog.

After the bath, I was giving Patty the bottle she demands and while that was happening, Lenore created a big pile of poop (fortunately more or less solid), which Max decided was a tasty morcel and began eating. I dropped Patty and her bottle and cleaned up.

As I said, SPCA people's conversations are really...basic.

I promise I will NOT discuss puppy poop in tomorrow's entry.