Thursday, August 21, 2008

Cousins Day - August

We're in the middle of the second year of Cousins Day and at the start, when we'd all settled ourselves in soft seats, one of us brought up something her therapist had said -- that the therapist was so excited about the concept of Cousins Day and thought we ought to let the whole world know about it (apparently my journal readership isn't large enough!). The therapist felt we should try to get on Oprah or Uncle Dr. Phil or something.

We discussed it and agreed that this was a very private thing and that to try to "market" it would cheapen it. I said that I felt that (a) it was almost impossible to get onto Oprah and wasn't really eager to do so, and (b) that if the therapist was so excited about this thing we've discovered she should market it to Oprah or Phil for us and then we'd discuss if we wanted to take it further. (I figured that got us off the hook!)

This was my "bye" month, so I didn't have to bring drinks or dinner (though we've decided starting next month to add "hors d'oeuvres" so there will be no more "bye" months.

Kathy brought lemon drop martinis and, since our last time together, discovered something absolute wonderful ... flavored sugar for drinks. Something to decorate the rim of the glasses.

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The lemon drop martinis are yummy to begin with, but add lemon flavored, cruncy sugar and they are...really, really good!

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We played "65" all afternoon and had our usual emotional catharsises (always more personal after the first round of drinks!). Last month, I didn't win a single hand in two days and this time around it was a bit more evenly spread...well, except for Peach, who didn't win anything. And she took the many losses so graciously. Not.

CDfoil.jpg (38704 bytes)But it was Peach's turn to make dinner and she fixed a delicious casserole, but...uh...had a bit of trouble managing the aluminum foil that she need to cover it up. (It may have been funnier after 2-3 martinis, I admit!)

My mother was supposed to go and get her car, which was in for servicing before she takes it on the long trip to Santa Barbara for the wedding, but we convinced her that after two martinis, she would not be safe on the road, especially during rush hour. I called the car place to ask them NOT to send the driver to pick her up. I think she was relieved.

So we just drank and played and ate and played and then decided we were all exhausted around 10 p.m. Peach and my mother went to bed, Kathy started working a puzzle, and I sat and read for about 5 minutes before I went to sleep too. I'd only had 4 hours sleep the night before because I'd been up writing the review for Hairspray.

I got up several times during the night for trips to the bathroom, but otherwise slept soundly all night long. We were all awake before 7 a.m. this morning and, as soon as the breakfast plates had been cleared away, the cards came out again.

I'm not sure of it's the cards that we enjoy so much, or if it's the fact that it's something to do while we're chatting about other things in our lives. The nice thing is that not only can we talk about our day-to-day lives, but since we share a lifelong history, we have a lifetime of memories to talk about. We all grew up with the same cast of characters in our lives and, whether we were close at the time or not, we understand when someone talks about the peculiarities of Aunt Betsy or the frustrations dealing with Cousin Ken, or the weird things Shirley used to do. There's no need to explain anything to anyone because we start on the same level. That's very special.

It's why I am reluctant to answer Oprah's call, should she want to discuss Cousins Day. Cousins Day works for us because we have history, chemistry and it came about because of circumstances. It was serendipitous. I'm not sure this is something you can write down a formula for so that others can follow it. Others have to find their own circumstances and their own chemistry.

Besides, how successful would a program be that starts with "find an elderly relative and convince her to break her ankle...."

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