A Bug Sandwich

(The title of this refers to the fact that the first and the last question both deal with bugs, while none of the middle questions do.)

1. You are walking down the road and you look down. There is a bug. Do you step on it?
Nah.  Live and let live.  I may not have always thought that way, but I still remember clearly the night Gilbert died.  I drove to his house to "straighten up" (as in get rid of anything gayly offensive) before his family flew in from Oklahoma.  I slept in his bed that night and there was a spider that was walking on the pillow.  My old reaction would have been to kill the damn thing, but I suddenly wondered what if reincarnation were real and what if Gilbert had come back as a spider in his own bed.  I took the thing to the outside and let it go free. Ever since then, I have been more respectful of all living things...they might be the reincarnated version of someone I loved!

2. What is one fantasy that you want to come true more than any other?
Goddammit, I want Peggy to be my friend again.  And like all fantasies, it ain't gonna happen.

3. Someone knocks on your door. Do you look out the window to see who it is before you open it? Do you open it regardless of who it is?
We get so many door to door solicitors, missionaries, and other annoying characters that I finally had Walt put in a peep hole in the door.  I always check before opening the door.  (It's also pointless to open the door with a solicitor while trying to restrain three dogs who want to either run away or kill whoever is at the door.)

Speaking of missionaries, I got this from my friend Carol the other day and thought I'd share: 

There was a knock on the door this past Saturday morning. I opened it to find a young, well-dressed man standing there who said, "Hello sir, I'm a Jehovah's Witness. So I said, "Come in and sit down." I offered him a fresh cup of coffee and I asked him, "What do you want to talk about?" He said, "Beats the shit out of me, nobody ever let me in before." 

4. Have you ever eaten Play Doh?
Fortunately Play Doh was invented after I became more discerning in my eating habits.   I probably ate the old fashioned paste a time or two, but Play Doh?  Never.

5. What was your favorite Saturday morning cartoon as a child and why?
I don't know if they had Saturday morning cartoons when I was a kid, since we didn't have as TV, but I did look forward to Saturday morning because that was the day when "Big John and Sparky" came on the radio.  We always listened to that in bed before we got up.

6. Are you a "people watcher"?
I am a serious people watcher.  One of these days I'm going to take notes and try to write something wonderful about it all, but for now I just watch.   So be careful what you do--I might be watching you.

7. I have a bowl of fruit. There are apples, oranges & pears. You help yourself to one. Which one do you choose?
No bananas?  OK, then I choose the orange.  I love pears, but it's so difficult to find "just the right one."  They are either under-ripe or mushy.  Oranges, however, are wonderful.  I love oranges.

8. What is your biggest pet peeve in the blogging world?
Bad grammar, terrible spelling, people who don't know the difference between "your" and "you're" or "they're" "their" and "there", and people who write in textspeak instead of real words.

9. What is one religion that you could just never see yourself joining?
Any religion that campaigns against gay rights.  I'd make a lousy Baptist. Heck, these days I'd make a lousy Catholic too!

10. What word do you use far too often?
Probably "cool."  I used to be cutesy when writing and spelled it "kewl" but now I just go for the run of the mill "cool."

11. How long do you spend in the shower?
Not long.  I've never timed it, but I'll guess 5 minutes.

12. If you were to write a personal ad about yourself, what would it say?
Zoftig woman in the last years of her life enjoys napping, eating, reading and watching TV.  When vertical, likes to write letters and anything else that crosses her path.  Fond of dogs.  Not much into housework, but can cook a bit when she puts her mind to it.  If this is the woman of your dreams, contact her husband of 46-1/2 years and see if he's interested in a deal.

13. Your favorite flavor of soup is….?
Canned soup would be Cream of Tomato or Chicken Noodle (memories of my childhood).   Soup in restaurants:  there are many (we had such incredible soups on our Russia cruise), but the one that I will always order, if available, is tortilla soup.   As for homemade soup, I haven't made it in a very long time, but I have a wonderful recipe for "lamb soup of the Middle East."  I must buy a leg of lamb when the prices drop (last roast I saw was about 2 lbs and cost $35) and make it again sometime!

14. You are sitting on a bench in the park and a bug walks in front of your feet….
If I wasn't going to kill him when I was walking, I'm certainly not going to kill him while I'm sitting down.