Yesterday, my mother called and asked me to come over, that she had "some things to talk with me about." I wondered all the way over what she perceived I'd done wrong, or what she could possibly want.
Turns out she's been having anxiety attacks for the last 2 days (I last saw her on Friday). She can't stop shaking. Gets up and doesn't know where she is what she's supposed to be doing. She wanted me to fix her, but obviously she needed some kind of mild sedative, and definitely needed to consult a doctor. We talked a lot and she agreed, which told me how bad she must be feeling because she NEVER willingly goes to the doctor.
I called Kaiser in front of her and made the appointment (which she doesn't remember my doing, but still agrees to go). I tried to get her laughing by laughing when she tried to pull the sleeves of her shirt down to cover the couple of old age spots she had and said everyone will think she's old. I told her she tells everyone her age and everyone KNOWS she's old.
I got the bright idea to fix her a vodka tonic, which I think was a good idea -- a mild sedative. Then I said I'd stay for dinner but then decided to get her OUT of Atria and take her to dinner at a nearby Chinese restaurant. I couldn't believe that she had FOUR helpings of chow mein, in addition to two helpings of some mushroom dishes I ordered (because she loves mushrooms). I haven't seen her eat that much in months. I think she was OK when we dropped her back Atria but I was curious to hear what the doctor had to say.
I told her I can't imagine how terrifying it must be to be HER and talked openly about the worsening memory loss. I have never yet used the "D" word with her. I don't know if she could handle it.
So this morning I went to pick her up for her doctor's appointment and not only did she not remember having an appointment (though I sat in front of her so she could hear me making it, and she wrote it down on a special paper so she would remember...but that doesn't surprise me) but she feels absolutely fine and does not remember ever feeling nervous, so she doesn't know what she would tell a doctor. Maybe I should make sure she has a vodka tonic every day.
I don't know if canceling her appointment was the right thing to do, but given that she is fine and doesn't ever remember being so frantic about being so nervous, it probably was.
I wrote to ask Ned, Ed and Jeri to check in with her, at least by phone, over the weekend. I'm sure she'll be just fine.
I'm not so sure I will !!!!
The good news on the Atria front is that after nearly a month, and two letters to service folks at corporate headquarters (which address the beautician gave me), I finally have had an apology from the manager at Atria. In truth, it was a CYA (cover your ass) apology and his sincerity was suspect, but he gave it. Said there was a "plumbing problem" in the private dining room, with water leaking from the kitchen into there. NOBODY knew about it, including the wait staff or the staff at the front desk, but he assures me it was well known.
He offered to host a special family dinner where the chef will prepare a special meal. I don't want to do that. The new chef makes crappy food and what I don't need is a special crappy meal that he will make under protest because a relative complained. So I told the guy that we didn't need that and that the apology would suffice. He hung up without saying goodbye. But I won't mention that. I am underwhelmed with the new management at Atria. Managers there seem to come and go quickly, and I can only hope that this one, too, will be gone soon and that maybe his replacement will be better.
Atria recently underwent extensive (and obviously very expensive) renovation and it has now lost the warm feeling that attracted me in the first place. You can't find anything anywhere. The puzzle table has disappeared (and if they have moved it, my mother will never find it). The food has gone from pretty good to pretty bad and the service in the dining room, by stint of an obvious cut-back on servers is consistently terrible.
For this she pays $4,100 a month.
But she's happy, at least, and for now has the funds to cover it for several more years. I just don't speak of it in glowing terms any more.
Turns out she's been having anxiety attacks for the last 2 days (I last saw her on Friday). She can't stop shaking. Gets up and doesn't know where she is what she's supposed to be doing. She wanted me to fix her, but obviously she needed some kind of mild sedative, and definitely needed to consult a doctor. We talked a lot and she agreed, which told me how bad she must be feeling because she NEVER willingly goes to the doctor.
I called Kaiser in front of her and made the appointment (which she doesn't remember my doing, but still agrees to go). I tried to get her laughing by laughing when she tried to pull the sleeves of her shirt down to cover the couple of old age spots she had and said everyone will think she's old. I told her she tells everyone her age and everyone KNOWS she's old.
I got the bright idea to fix her a vodka tonic, which I think was a good idea -- a mild sedative. Then I said I'd stay for dinner but then decided to get her OUT of Atria and take her to dinner at a nearby Chinese restaurant. I couldn't believe that she had FOUR helpings of chow mein, in addition to two helpings of some mushroom dishes I ordered (because she loves mushrooms). I haven't seen her eat that much in months. I think she was OK when we dropped her back Atria but I was curious to hear what the doctor had to say.
I told her I can't imagine how terrifying it must be to be HER and talked openly about the worsening memory loss. I have never yet used the "D" word with her. I don't know if she could handle it.
So this morning I went to pick her up for her doctor's appointment and not only did she not remember having an appointment (though I sat in front of her so she could hear me making it, and she wrote it down on a special paper so she would remember...but that doesn't surprise me) but she feels absolutely fine and does not remember ever feeling nervous, so she doesn't know what she would tell a doctor. Maybe I should make sure she has a vodka tonic every day.
I don't know if canceling her appointment was the right thing to do, but given that she is fine and doesn't ever remember being so frantic about being so nervous, it probably was.
I wrote to ask Ned, Ed and Jeri to check in with her, at least by phone, over the weekend. I'm sure she'll be just fine.
I'm not so sure I will !!!!
The good news on the Atria front is that after nearly a month, and two letters to service folks at corporate headquarters (which address the beautician gave me), I finally have had an apology from the manager at Atria. In truth, it was a CYA (cover your ass) apology and his sincerity was suspect, but he gave it. Said there was a "plumbing problem" in the private dining room, with water leaking from the kitchen into there. NOBODY knew about it, including the wait staff or the staff at the front desk, but he assures me it was well known.
He offered to host a special family dinner where the chef will prepare a special meal. I don't want to do that. The new chef makes crappy food and what I don't need is a special crappy meal that he will make under protest because a relative complained. So I told the guy that we didn't need that and that the apology would suffice. He hung up without saying goodbye. But I won't mention that. I am underwhelmed with the new management at Atria. Managers there seem to come and go quickly, and I can only hope that this one, too, will be gone soon and that maybe his replacement will be better.
Atria recently underwent extensive (and obviously very expensive) renovation and it has now lost the warm feeling that attracted me in the first place. You can't find anything anywhere. The puzzle table has disappeared (and if they have moved it, my mother will never find it). The food has gone from pretty good to pretty bad and the service in the dining room, by stint of an obvious cut-back on servers is consistently terrible.
For this she pays $4,100 a month.
But she's happy, at least, and for now has the funds to cover it for several more years. I just don't speak of it in glowing terms any more.
No comments:
Post a Comment