What Did You Do on YOUR Anniversary?

Today is Shelly and Ellen's second wedding anniversary. They've been together nearly 40 years, but have only been legally married for only two years.

I'm sure they would have loved to spend the day enjoying each other's company, maybe having a romantic dinner. Instead they were back in San Francisco, with another poster, standing outside city hall, waiting to hear about the closing arguments in the case asking to overturn Proposition 8.

To make matters worse, and add insult to injury, those defending Prop 8 added an extra little twist--they want the decision to take away the 18,000 legal marriages that have already taken place. Oh, I think they realize that they can't actually nullify those legal marriages, but they want a ruling which says that nobody has to acknowledge them. Which is pretty much the same thing.

As the trial over California's prohibition on same-sex marriage enters its final stage today, the ban's sponsors are urging the judge to go a step further and revoke state recognition of the marriages of 18,000 gay and lesbian couples who wed before voters passed Proposition 8.

Such an order would honor "the expressed will of the people," backers of the November 2008 ballot measure said Tuesday in their final written filing before Chief U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker.

Andrew Pugno, an attorney for Prop. 8's backers, said in an interview that the sponsors aren't asking Walker to nullify the 18,000 marriages, but only to rule that government agencies, courts and businesses no longer have to recognize the couples as married.

-- San Francisco Chronicle

In the days before final arguments began, the Mormon Church was found guilty on 13 counts of late campaign reporting. They reported they had contributed $2,078 to the campaign to pass Prop 8. In reality they spent $190,000, the largest contributor to the camaign, as well as contributing non-monetarily to the campaign by sending Mormon campaign volunteers through the Church's "mission" program and offering use of church ward (parish) properties throughout the state..

The Catholic Bishop in San Francisco sent out flyers to all of its parishioners urging a yes vote on Prop 8 because "If the Supreme Court ruling stands public schools may have to teach children that there is no difference between traditional marriage and 'gay' marriage." (--SF Chronicle)

A shocked parishioner at Most Holy Redeemer parish, which advertises itself a "your Catholic church in the Castro" says, "What does that even mean? Your son could marry a boy because he doesn't know any better? It will be against the law to tell him so?"

During the initial hearings on the issue, the defenders of Prop 8 could find almost nobody to testify for them. Their one witness ended up admitting that even he could not see how same sex marriage would adversely affect straight marriage.

The web site, Religious Tolerance gives the reasons why same sex marriage is a bad idea (along with rebuttal arguments).

• Gays and lesbians make bad parents

• Children need to be raised by biological parents

• A child raised by a same sex couple will be subject to hate

• Marriage is only feasible if a couple is monogamous; same sex couples cannot be

• Same sex couples cannot bring children into the world by themselves

• If same-sex marriages are legalized, then decriminalization of prostitution, polygyny, polyandry, and incest will necessarily follow. Men will marry two or more women; women will marry multiple men; multiple women and multiple men will form group marriages; men will want to marry their dogs, whom they dearly love; etc. Once the floodgates are opened, there will be no stopping the changes.

• Children of gay and lesbian parents will become homosexual

Isn't it time to grow up and acknowledge that gay couples are here to stay, that they are no better, no worse parents than straight parents, that they are no more and no less subject to infidelity as their local politician, and that they are as deserving of respect and legal rights as all the rest of us?

Iceland recently joined the list of 21 countries where gay marriage or civil unions are legal. In this country marriage, or something like it is the law in Connecticut, the District of Columbia, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New York, Maine, Massachusetts, Vermont and Iowa. Here in the hotbed of wing nuts and sexual liberation we are still fighting to allow same sex couples the right to have the same legal rights as the rest of us.

Happy Anniversary, Ellen and Shelly. I just hope that some day you won't have to spend the day fighting so hard to be who you are.

San Francisco Chronicle's excellent wrap-up of the day's proceedings here.