Sunday Stealing

NOTE:  I finally got our Christmas Letter posted

The "Have You Ever" meme

1) Have you ever gotten lost in a maze?
I learned in England that if you enter and keep your hand on the outside wall of the maze, you will never get lost.  At least that was the theory which has so far proven correct

2) Have you ever been attacked by a wild animal?
Do pit bull puppies count?

3) Have you ever ridden a camel?
It was Perth, Australia.  It was pouring rain.  The ride was designed for little kids.  The guy leading us through the downpour thought we were insane.

We were

4) Have you ever pet a rat?
Oh my yes.  We bought a pair of rats to let the kids experience the joy of reproduction.  They did their jobs and we managed (with difficulty) to find homes for all the babies, including a pair to the 3rd grade teacher who wanted her class to experience the joy of reproduction.  Unfortunately, after the rats did their jobs, she discovered she was deathly allergic to rats.  She was able to find a home for the male rat, but what idiot would take a pregnant female.  Me, of course.  She had a litter of babies and then, when they were just a tad too young to make it on their own, on Christmas morning, she died. I don't know from what.  We managed to keep the babies alive (even the one we found in the cat's mouth).  We had to buy "bitch's milk" in a can the size of an evaporated milk can.  It says "discard after 3 days."  Do you know how much milk five baby rats take in 3 days?  The can costs $12.  They finally reached teenage-hood and I gave them to a local pet store.  I convinced myself they would be sold as pets and tried not to think about the snakes the store also sold.

Rats are great pets, BTW, if you don't let them get pregnant.

5) Have you ever been a member of a gym?
Yes.  For many years.  We still are, though neither of us has been in it a very long time.

6) Have you ever been in a helicopter?
Yes.  We were flying from California to Minnesota with 3 kids (including an infant).  Somehow our flight was changed from the Oakland airport to the San Francisco airport so they flew us by helicopter.  I don't remember how we got back to Oakland after we returned, or if our return flight landed in Oakland.

7) Have you ever cheated at a test?
Yes.  I was a dishonest kid.

8) Have you ever ridden a tractor?
I don't think so

9) Have you ever passed wind/gas in an embarrassing situation?
I'm 71 years old.  I always pass gas in embarrassing situations!

10) Have you ever played the bongos?
I have hit a bongo.  I have never actually played a bongo.

11) Have you ever handled a snake?
I babysat one time for kids who had a snake.  I decided I would get over my dislike of snakes and agreed to hold it.  The damn thing PEED on me!

12) Have you ever assembled furniture by yourself?
I think I put together our CD case, but needed help from Walt for getting it right.

13) Have you ever been scuba diving?
No.

14) Have you ever had a disastrous interview?
Not disastrous interviews of me but I interview folks occasionally for the newspaper.  I usually am pretty good winging it, but I interviewed this high falutin' director and had not done my homework well enough.  I had a terrible time coming up with questions and she gave monosyllabic answers and treated me like I was an idiot.  I was for that interview.

15) Have you ever sold your services?
Many, many times.  I was an at-home cake decorator for 2-3 years, provided home care for children, and did typing out of my house.  I also for a very, very brief time did computer instruction for older people like me who just wanted someone patient to teach them the basics. I called my business "double click" until someone came up with the same service for free and someone else started a better business called Double Click.

16) Have you ever raised money for charity?
Starting with selling penny stamps for the missionaries when I was in grammar school, raising money for charity has been a lifelong activity.  Kids in 3rd World countries, AIDS research, elephants, dogs....you name it and I have probably raised money for it at one time or another.

17) Have you ever won a giant sized cuddly toy from a fair?
Nope.  I am TERRIBLE at those kinds of games.

18) Have you ever milked a cow?
No...unless you count collecting my own milk for a sick baby in the hospital (not mine)

19) Have you ever used the phrase "back in my time" to someone younger than you?
See Question #9 ... I'm almost 72 years old.  Of course I have used that phrase.

20) Have you ever invented a fairly unique meal or drink?
You know, I know I have but I can't at the moment think of any examples.  Some inventions were more successful than others.