Bittersweet

Sunday was a bittersweet day from start to finish.  We started at Atria, meeting Ned and Marta for brunch, to celebrate my mother's birthday, which is tomorrow.

We've been over this for a week or more, but she didn't remember, of course.  After her surprise that I was there, she was surprised again when Ned and Marta showed up, and especially when they wished her a happy birthday because she never realized it was her birthday.

When we all went to lunch, she asked why and then was surprised to find out it was her birthday and then as we sat down, she was astonished to learn it was her birthday.  One thing about dementia--you get a lot of nice surprises!

For lunch we asked for two servings of brownie with ice cream.  Walt wanted one of his own and Ned, Marta, my mother and I shared the other, which Ned cut into 4 equal pieces.  She laughed when served, then looked away and when she looked back, she asked where that had come from and why were we having dessert and then was surprised to find out it was her birthday.

To my surprise, when we returned to the apartment, a woman, pushing a woman I had never seen before, knocked on the door.  The woman who knocked obviously knew my mother and it was someone I had never seen before, which pleased me because my mother kinda sorta recognized her, which means she has made friends with someone on the staff.  Anyway, the woman was bringing her a card and a piece of cake (which will sit in the fridge until I finally throw it away next month)

All things considered, except for the dementia part, it was a good day, she was in good spirits, we laughed a lot and then Walt and I went home, while Ned and Marta spent another 3 hours or so there until time to go to our second event of the day.

The second event was the memorial service for our friend Dave Fisk.  One of the things they included was a video that had been made by an organization he was part of, which is only 6 minutes long and was so perfect to show Dave, his history, and his family.  If you'd like to see it, you can find it here.

It was a beautiful memorial and the Art Center, where it was held, was packed.  By serendipitous chance, the gallery where they hold periodic exhibitions had no shows up at the moment, so they used the gallery to showcase Dave's watercolors and mementos of his life.  Really a lovely way to see the whole of Dave's life.

There was a beautiful memorial service, with memories by almost everyone in the large Fisk-Bonneau family.  This is their second offspring funeral (oldest son Greg died of cancer many years ago), and they are also a performing family, so, like us, they know how to do a good memorial.

Dave had been the announcer for Davis Little League games, so after the memorial, we all walked across the street to the Little League field, where we all stood around and sang "Take me out to the Ball Game," rooting, rooting, rooting for the Red Sox, Dave's favorite team.  

Afterwards, several people, big and little kids, ran the bases of the field.  This is a picture of Dave's brother Chad coming into home plate (I was sorry he didn't slide!)

It was a loving day and we saw lots of people we had not seen in years.  I also hugged Dave's brother Jason, retired now, but formerly defensive tackle for the Vikings, with whom he played Super Bowl XXXIV, and other teams.  I had not realized a person could be so tall or so muscular!  The man's a rock and, like everyone else in his family, one of the sweetest people you'd ever meet.

So it was with mixed emotions that we left the memorial.  Both events had been full of love, but also touched with sadness.